About Scotto Expertise I can answer questions ranging from:
People who want to swing but have questions.
People who want to put their toe in the water but don't want to become swingers.
Experience I have participated in numerous swinging situations in the past including moresomes and threesomes including mfm and fmf types.
Publications literotica.com
Education/Credentials Bachelors with some Masters work in business.
Expert: Scotto Date: 9/30/2007 Subject: But, how do you get started?
Question Hi Scotto,
My wife and I have been together for seven years. We have a great relationship - excellent communication, but fairly puritanical thus far as sex goes. We we're talking about fantasies we'd like to fulfill, and she announced she'd always been a bit bi-curious. So here I am thinking "Jackpot," as most men would, I'm sure. On further discussion, we decided that we would draw the line at what amounts to soft swap, which is perfectly acceptable.
So what's the problem? Well, it's damn near impossible to find a single woman looking for a couple. It's a matter of ratios. So I suggested that it might make sense to try a "girls with their own spouses and each other only" swap with a couple. And that's when things went wrong. She just totally shut down... wouldn't talk about it at all.
Now, I know my wife. I'm certain this is centered on some physical insecurity as it pertains to being seen naked by another man. I think she's the most beautiful woman in the world, and tell her so daily - hourly even. For all my experience with her, I just can't seem to coax a rationale out of her. I had thought, with our ground rules, we were in pretty safe territory. Any suggestions on how to help her come to a resolution on this? There's a great on-site club nearby. My wife loves to dance, and I think the socialization would be great for us. I just don't want to force the issue and risk ruining our excellent relationship. Please help!
Answer Hi Tim, sorry for the tardiness of this reply. I think you are dead on if she is okay with it to go to a local swing club--not with the intent of finding someone for her to have sex with but for the intent of just seeing what the market looks like. She can then see that there are people there of all shapes and sizes and will also probably have people that express sexual interest in her so she can see that she is sexually attractive to men and women. Just decide what you will and won't have for boundaries before you go in because making them up on the fly isn't a good option given the heat of the moment decisions that at the time seem attractive but are later regretted. Good luck and I hope this helps.
