About David Rhodes Expertise Questions related to adultery, abuse, broken relationships. Counselor since 1991 and I have seen and heard just about every story ever told about adultery. First, there is no such thing as just an "emotional affair". "Forsake all others" should mean something. Secondly, the rebuilding a marriage marred by adultery can be stronger, more loving, and fulfilling than you ever imagined. Happiness and peace can be yours once again.
Experience Counselor since 1991 specializing in marital.
Organizations American Psychological Association
National Christian Counselors Association
Education/Credentials Bachelors - Ashland University, Ashland, Ohio
MBA - Case Western Reserve University, Cleveland, Ohio
PhD - Freedom Bible College, Rogers, Arkansas (under study)
Past/Present Clients Volunteer in "Marriage" category
Expert: David Rhodes Date: 4/22/2008 Subject: Wife has lost feelings for me but has feelings for someone else
Question How do I get my Wifes feelings back for me. We are separated at the moment and she wants space. I can't give her space because I am living 20mins away and the other guy is around the corner. I have asked her to stop contact with him so we can work on our marriage. She says she has but I don't know if i believe her. I think I am trying to hard to show her i can change and that I love her more than anything. I wasn't very affectionate before and this guy gave her what I should have. How can I fix this?? We are starting counseling tomorrow. She says she is confused and doesn't know what she wants or if she can get her feelings back. What can I do??
Answer Mark - Counseling is the first critical step.
And don't blame yourself for her mistake. A lack of affection is not an excuse for violating marriage vows.
So, focus on healing first. Rebuilding second. And moving on together third.
Two events need to happen for the healing to begin;
1. She must apologize and show genuine contrition for her horrible mistake.
2. You must determine that you are going to forgive her and rebuild the relationship.
These two components are the foundation of reconciliation.
Please keep me posted and stick with the counseling. Be patient.