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Adultery/Cheating wife. not sure what to do now!


Jimmy B wrote at 2009-01-27 03:50:11
Hi, I read your story.  The Catholic church sponsors something called Retrouvaille for trouble marriages.  Take a look at it.  My wife and I struggled with financial and other issues including autism.  Its worth a look.  It will help you get back to some basics.  As far as the cheating, it has to go.  Retrouvaille will help your marriage get back to the basics.

lamestllama wrote at 2009-07-16 15:44:35
I have been through this. Phone the other mans wife and tell her. Even if they have an open marriage that will not include having it rubbed in her face. That will leave your wife without a lover. Then when "she" is feeling vunerable you put it on the line. Either she shapes up or ships out. No infidelity will be accepted. And yes if you got fat you will be better of loosing the weight but that is a seperate issue to her infidelity and should not be tied in with anything she needs to do to fix this marriage.

concerned4u wrote at 2011-06-23 01:03:52
I really believe that your wife may suffer from a personality disorder such as borderline. I am going through a similar situation where all the signs of cheating are present. My wife was diagnosed with depression and is very impulsive with things like spending. She gets bored fast and needs to have the newest everything (cell phone, car, clothes, shoes) whether we were able to afford them or not. Sex for my wife is impulsive, addictive, and risky! I feel bad for her victims! I, like you. gained weight over our 14 years of marriage. She left me and I believe she was having many affairs throughout the years. I realize now that I put her on a pedestal at the expense of myself. I worshiped her and this was not right. Marriage and love is a 2 way street with mutual love and respect. I, like you walked on eggshells around my wife. I tried to please her and make her happy- What happens is, after they hook you, you become obsessed and addicted to them. They leave and you are like an alcoholic who just went cold turkey. It just may be what some of you are needing to consider when you ask yourselves "why is my wife cheating?" For some it is part of a larger personality disorder that you have no control over. I have come to the conclusion that my marriage needs to be over so I can heal and be freed from the hooks of a controlling, manipulating, and cheating spouse. I realize now that everything was always about my wife! Everything--even the great sex life was to meet her needs! Everything was for and about her! Consider researching borderline personality disorder and the famous book about it called, "Walking On Eggshells." Just some thoughts for the discussion. Lots of luck to you!

candy wrote at 2014-07-03 08:39:42
When you suspect your spouse is cheating on you, you will want to figure out the truth. It is  very helpful if you have access to every phone call, text and e-mail they sent. If so, a new  cell-phone spying application might necessary for you.

Mobile Spy allows users to monitor  every move made on a person's mobile phone, from call info and text messages to websites  visited, e-mails sent and received, new contacts added and even the GPS location of the  phone's user. Even deleted e-mails and texts can be retrieved by Mobile Spy.  With all the info, will it be difficult to catch a cheating spouse?


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I can answer questions about how to handle your position with a cheating spouse or one that has cheated recently. How to straighten up your life and get back on track one way or the other. My answers will include God because He fills the most vital part in your recovery. They will also include help with the decisions you will have to make to clean things up.


Was cheated on several times by the same woman. We were able to save and keep our marriage, and we will never have this problem again.

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