Expert: Laura Giles - 9/20/2011

Question
i have been married since 2004 to a wonderful wife. i love God and i ve been saved since 2001. i decided to do the work of god as part-time pastor starting 2006 combined with my secular work as accountant. though it has not been easy for us as couple particularly in the area of sex. i want sex but my wife does not want it.

sometime in June 2010, i begin to behave funny which lead to adultery with one of my female friend and i never stop there. i was moving from one lady to another lady till may 2011. during these period i tried to stop but i could not stop my mess. continue with double life as a pastor and adulterer.

until i meet a lady that use charm (juju) on me and took my manhood to the satanic spiritual world and utimately i became impotent then it dawn on me that my life has been sold to the devil.

i cry and pray to god for repentance and forgiveness. spoke a pastor in another church and confess sins to him. we begin to pray together for miracle and indeed my impotency was restore after a week (the greatest miracle that has ever happened to me).

i believe god loves me more than what i can ever imagine and that was he healed and restore my potency, i mean He will have just leave me with the impotency as a punishment for my disobedience forever and ever.

however, my question is that, i feel guilt sometime that can i still be use by god again, even though i am still in my part-time pastoring. i want resign my job and to go another city and start again as a full time pastor because i have a burden for the sinners.

But i am afraid, may i should quit the ministry totally and face my secular job and live a normal christian and just serving in a local church without anything called pastoring a church.

Answer
Dear Balance,

God doesn't call perfect people to minister for him. He calls humans. Human beings are flawed sinners. They understand the human condition and can relate to the suffering of others because they too have suffered and sinned.

If you continue to feel called to minister, you should use this experience to preach with compassion and understanding. When someone comes to you with problems, don't judge and condemn. Encourage them back to their path with forgiveness. We are all given temptations so that we may learn from them.

If you use this situation as a learning experience, then you will have grown from it. If you continue to punish yourself and feel guilty about it, you will have taken all the learning out of it and it will be useless to you.

Best of luck,

Laura Giles