Aging/age,ocular migraines and fear of death
I am a 60 year old lady who suffers from panic disorder also low b12 and sometimes iron, I have suffered from ocular migraines since I was 30 year old .I have had all the tests to rule out illnesses and the doctor said the blind coloured spots in my eyes are from stress. Ok, how do I deal with this, everytime I get one I get so panicky and I am terrified, You would think after all these years I would stop being scared but this is not the case. I am sensitised for days after a ocular and I am always checking my eyes to see if I am getting one. It has become like a phobia even while I am typing this desperate letter of please reassure me I have my eyes held opened wide all my muscles around my eyes feel so tight and taut. I am so scared of the dazzling light show ,Mt eye doctor assures me that my optic nerves at the back of my eyes are so healthy and for a little while I feel safe again until another attack comes out of the blue, and I am frightened all over again. How does one deal with this? The attacks went away for years and out of the blue when I am at my best they came back, Please help me feel safe again ,If you know of a way to deal with these migraines or whatever they are I sure would love some advice. I am always so very scared and my biggest fear is the fear of death,and I do not look sixty but I am and I am so frightened of my future,
Thank you so very much for making the time for me
First realize that ALL of us are terrified.
The reason for that is the news; we are bombarded with a daily dose of nothing but news, bad news, and terrible news. MOST of which never happens to us personally. Just hearing about all that bad, bad, bad freaks us out. Then add television shows. What mostly is on tv today?
Crime dramas where women are murdered. After a while you begin to think that criminals are everywhere, waiting to do harm to women.
When we get scared, our muscles tighten up. Which shrinks the diamater of our blood vessels. The reason for the tightening muscles is to minimize bleeding when we get cut and/or bit. Thousands of years dealing with wild animals made this defensive response in our bodies. With that comes lower blood flow, higher blood pressure and then headaches, etc.
An immediate solution to your fears is stretching. I use to work in a very high stress job where my body would tighten up like a rock. When I felt the panic attack coming on, I went into the men's room, stood in front of the sink counter, feet together, standing back about 2 feet, hands on the counter, and do push ups from the counter. Stretching my legs and arms and shoulders. Back and forth, for about a minute. I immediately felt better, and went back to work. I found it necessary to do this once every hour. My former supervisor did not agree with it and tried to stop me from my 1-minute bathroom breaks. He then died of a heart attack, at age 38. I am 62, retired, still here.
BETTER results would be to go to a gym. I picked a city wellness center gym where I go once a week. I like to use the sit-down machines. I set the weights at the lowest settings and do 40-50 reps per exercise. Really releases all the stress. Since I go once a week, I pay only $4 cash for my 2 hour visit. I use the city bus so even driving stress is eliminated for me. Again, $2 round trip. Stand up exercises, such as the treadmill, just gives more stress to my body. So I do not do them.
Now let's talk about death. EVERYTHING dies. Even rocks and minerals have a span of existence. And they decay to nothing but dust. So everything in our universe has a span of life, then death. EVERYTHING. The big difference is that we, as people, have control over our life span.
At age 13, I wrote down how my entire life would be. I am now, as I said, age 62, and 80% of what I wrote down, has come true for me. My last thing on my list of 'Things to do before I die,' is that I will celebrate my 120th birthday, and die the next day! And why not? By then,I will have done everything I wanted to do in my life. WE control our lives, or let others decide our lives for us.
After death? Watch the movie "Heaven is Real." The book is more amazing. Do I know that heaven is real? No one 100% knows it is real, or is NOT. It is what we believe. I choose to believe that each day will be a great day and heaven will be even better.
And so far, so good. I have had a wonderful life. Always changing, but always good.
Hope to hear from you again when you are 90 and still living your life free of fear. It CAN be done.
Have a fantastic day.
PS Look up quotes from George Burns. He lived to 100.