Expert: Michalene Peticca - 12/9/2008

Question
Hello.

My mother passed away a few weeks ago.  We just found out that she died of heart failure due to sepsis.  It also states on the death certificate that she had sepsis for days.  They didn't say how many.

My father had a bladder infection test done 10 days before she died.  All the nurses kept saying is "All the tests aren't in."

What happened?  Did they let her die not telling my father that she had sepsis?

Also, after they pronounced her dead, a tear was coming from her eye.  Can a dead body do this?  I am very worried.  My Dad is very upset.  We need solid answers.

When we first called the doctor, they said call the nursing home.  We called the nursing home and they said to call the doctor.  Both are supposed to call my dad back at this point.

Please help me find some answers to this.

Thank you for your time.

Susan Paris

Answer
Hello Susan,

I am sure this is a very difficult time for you and your family.  My condolences on the loss of your mother.  Although she was in a nursing home, i know we are never prepared for when our love one passes on, and so we all want to know Why and how our loved one can pass away.

I cannot answer your questions affirmatively about the response of care to the testing with your mother as several factors may come into play, such as:  1. had she had sepsis in the past?  2. was she already on an antibiotic for an infection, what was the main reason for the sepsis?   3.  was the doctor notified that she may have an infection?  4. was your family willing to have her sent to the hospital under any condition?    

Perhaps instead of calling the nursing home and doctor again, you may want to take several weeks and just sort out the last month of your mom's care.   What i think i am hearing is that you may feel the nursing home and/or doctor were not "doing their jobs".   This may or may not be, but i do know that the shock of losing someone can be quite disturbing and we tend to want to put "blame" on something or someone for it.

Just take some time and review why your mother was in a nursing home in the first place.  What were her main diagnoses?  

Yes, it is common for bodily fluids to be expelled from the body at time of death. I know this may have been very upsetting for you.  

Again, i am sorry for your loss. I'm sorry i don't have all the answers.   I know you will find healing in taking things slow and being there for your father right now.

With sympathy,

Michalene Peticca, MA