Expert: Mary Gordon - 1/27/2004

Question
Dear, dear Mary,
The "allexperts" website was such a wonderful blessing and continues to be so:  I emailed you in the summer regarding the status of my father, who I felt was in end stage AD and your response was read at the time, and again just weeks ago.
My Dad died in August, 2003, shortly after I contacted you and your reply was gentle, detailed, empathetic and so very, very helpful.  It was printed, shared with other caregivers and recently re-read while going through various belongings.  
How very grateful I am that you answered with such  sensitivity, wisdom and insight and would like you to know that your comfort has continued.
Thank you so very much.
With gratitude,
Sue

Answer
Dear Sue - I'm so glad I was able to help you in some small measure.

I know what a devastating thing Alzheimers must have been for your family, as it was for mine. I had seen my share of illness and death among loved ones, but nothing that I found as hard to cope with as having to watch Alzheimers dismantle a wonderful, loving woman neuron by neuron, and rob her of knowing her grandchildren and enjoying her golden years -  on reflection we were determined that something good should come of all that misery.

Such difficult life lessons come out of the long road with Alzheimers - its a school no one wants to attend  - but I think it honours the memory of those we've lost if we can lighten the load of others by putting out our hands to them.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Mary Gordon
Toronto
In memory of Charlotte Aileen "Dolli" Bertram 1919-1999