Expert: Joanne - 9/12/2008

Question
Due to a lot of depression and some other issues, I struggled with an eating disorder for a few years. Because it was kinda've on and off, some months being almost normal and others dropping to as little as 500 calories a day, I never got supper skinny. However, I was lucky - some friends caught on and forced me to get help. The doctor I went to said I was really lucky - I showed a lot the signs of the beginning of anorexia(such as a very unrealistic view of my body's food requirements and a body image that was about 20lbs off ).
  It's been almost a year, and I feel like I'm doing really well. With the help of my friends I forced myself to forget about weight and just get healthy. I have a much more realistic view of food, and a better body image. But part of that is being REALLY careful - I only recently bought a scale after a year of not letting myself anywhere near one. But, because I destroyed my metabolism, when I first started eating consistently again (as in 1600 calories a day)I gained about 15 lbs. Which would bring me to 5'3" and 145 lbs. Now I eat around 1700-1800 calories a day, and usually take about an hour walk every day. My question is - what is a healthy amount of weight to lose? How quickly? The last thing I want is to fall back into old patterns, and all the diet sites say things like "cut out 500 calories a day" - if I did that, I'd be back where I started! And while I hate that I weigh more, I LIKE being healthy, not get sick every week and not always being tired!

At the same time, I am above the recommended BMI, and I'd really like to fit into a size 4 jeans (I think that's realistic). I'm curvy (bra size 32 D) and that probably affects what I should weigh as well.

 It was so hard making the changes I did, and really hard to break out of that old mindset. I want to lose weight and be a normal, healthy size - but I'm really scared! I'm still not 100% sure that I can lose weight and not fall back into old habits. I don't want lose all the progress I've made.

Any help? Suggestions, anything. thank you!  

Answer
Jessie

I would like to point out, as you probably already know, you are only just over the recommended range of 'normal' BMI.  Losing 5-10lbs could put you within the normal range, but I definitely would not recommend dropping much lower than 135lbs.  ONLY DO THIS IF YOU ARE SURE THAT THIS CAN BE DONE IN A HEALTHY AND CONTROLLED WAY.  If you are still in contact with the Doctor that originally treated you, then please talk to them before you start to lose any weight.  

I'd say that providing your body has recovered, you could drop to 1400-1500 calories a day, but I wouldn't drop any lower than that.  Weight loss should be gradual - the longer it takes to lose, the more likely it will stay off.  Rather than cutting down calories, increasing the calories you burn may be a better idea.

Whatever you decide to do, just make sure that you do it safely, and if you think at any point you are returning to old behaviours, it is important for you to seek help very early.

As you have suggested that you don't think you can trust yourself not to fall into old behaviours, then I'd recommend that you maybe don't do this now!  Seek more therapy if you believe that you are at risk of relapsing at any point.  It is dangerous to attempt weight loss if you can't guarantee that you will know when to stop.  If you feel that you HAVE to lose weight, then it may be worth looking into weight loss groups rather than attempting this alone.  Have your friends or family involved so that any reappearance of disordered eating patterns are picked up on and dealt with quickly.

Please get the advice of anyone that has been involved in your care.  Make sure that they are aware of your fears and ask for their advice.  It may be worth asking for a referral to a dietician or nutritionist in order for someone to assess your diet and make adjustments that may help you lose weight without really trying.

I'd also think about ditching the scale!  I believe that recovering from an eating disorder should involve you being able to look at calories written on food packs and being able to look at your weight and not worry, however I think owning a set of scales is maybe setting yourself up for a fall when you fear relapse so much.

Joanne