Expert: Jeanne Rust, PhD - 12/3/2009

Question
I am currently trying to recover from anorexia. I have been an inpatient twice, gained the weight, or most of it at least, & then came home & lost it. This time I am recovering with adult ED services as an outpatient, & I feel so different this time, I am confident that I can do it.
The only thing is, when I look in the mirror I see 2 different things. I see the disgusting bones, I see the thinness. I am not blind to it really. My arms, chest, back, hips & ribs look awful. But as soon as I look at my stomach I feel fat & disgusting. I have quite a lot of stomach fat, okay maybe not more than an average woman, but my concern is how it will be in a few months time when I am much nearer my healthy weight. I can just see all the weight going to my stomach. I see this thin bony girl, with a huge stomach. & even if some weight did go to my back etc. some is still going to go to my stomach, so am sure I am always going to look out of proportion. Can you tell me anymore about this ?
Also I have not had a period in 22 months. Do you know if this could have any long term effects or is it unlikely to have any effects if I get healthy now?
I am 5foot7/171cm & 99lbs.
thankyou so very much  

Answer
Dear Natalie,

The refeeding part of eating disorder recovery for an anorexic is difficult -- and it is possible.  All anorexics who begin to recover experience much the same thing that you are -- feeling like their stomachs are fat and the rest of them thin.  

As your metabolism begins to be active again and you continue to add some more pounds, your body will readjust and your arms and legs will begin to fill out.  The reason your stomach feels so big right now is because there is a lot of fluid that collects.  You will, I promise, you will begin to get back into proportion!

In regards to your period, you probably won't get one naturally until you weigh more -- you'll need a BMI of at least 18.  You can also start on birth control pills to jump start your period.  Not a bad idea.  I will say that sometimes anorexics are not able to have children because of permanent hormone damage.

So keep on recovering -- do what you need to do to get well!!  Let me know how you do!

Warmly,
Jeannie Rust, PhD
CEO/Founder
Mirasol Recovery Centers
www.mirasol.net
www.edrecovery.com
888-520-1700