About Melissa Expertise I battled anorexia and bulimia for 6 years. I am not a doctor, but I learned a lot about the mental, emotional, and physical aspects of having an eating disorder and how scary it is to feel like you are alone in your illness. You are not alone. I can answer questions based on my experience with anything relating to anorexia and/or bulimia.
I can provide information on treatment options, some specific treatment centers, resources that may help you find a treatment center, and my opinion on all of the above. I was a patient at a few outpatient and inpatient programs so I am happy to answer questions about those experiences. I am not affiliated with any of the resources I may provide. It’s strictly my opinion based on my experiences.
I can NOT answer medical questions.
I will NOT answer questions on how to become anorexic or bulimic or how to lose weight in an unhealthy matter.
Experience I have recovered from a six year struggle with both anorexia and bulimia. I hope my experiences and the time I spent in and out of treatment will encourage others to never give up. I never thought I would or could recover because I couldn’t picture myself ever having a normal relationship with food. Since then, I have grown and learned that I can overcome what I once thought was impossible. Hold on to the idea that recovery is attainable!
Education/Credentials I am attending college for an unrelated degree.
Question My best friend of over 30 yrs had was bulimic from 17- 32, she said God delivered her from ( No Therapy)it and she has never since purged. She since @53 is skin and bones she is living on a very limited budget and is now home being a day trader. Her excuse is she is not making any money. She no longer has a social life and never eats dinner. She wears baggy sweats at home and has created a lifestyle that she has no visitors. I looked at her grocery receipts for a week and she eats carrots,celery,, Broccoli, soups, lean cuisine,and diet lemonade. She will not have any thing to do with fat of any kind. I told her she looked like she has an eating disorder and maybe the bulimia has resurfaced as anorexia, and she has withdrawn from our friendship and lives like a hermit. we used to have fun going out ,the last 5yrs she has become a recluse and @ 7pm she will say that she ate earlier and get very uncomfortable watching me eat my dinner. She then would break down and order food and eat the whole thing as if she were really hungry. She has made me the enemy now that I have expressed concern, we haven't spoken for months. What should a friend do in this case.
Answer Rhonda,
That sounds like a very terrifying situation. It sounds like you care about your friend a great deal.
I would encourage you to check out www.something-fishy.org. It has a lot of help and information for someone in your position.
I'm going to copy and paste some of the pertinent info for you:What You Can (and Can't) Do
The first thing to keep in mind is that as an "outsider" (not suffering from an Eating Disorder yourself) there are many things you cannot do to help a family member or friend to get better. You cannot force an Anorexic to eat, keep a bulimic from purging, or make a Compulsive Overeater stop overeating. The first thing to realize once you have come to the awareness that your loved-one suffers from an Eating Disorder, is that you must not concentrate immediately on the food. All forms of Eating Disorders are emotionally based and the behaviors are only a symptom to emotional and stress related problems. As said many times on this site, disordered eating is an attempt to control, hide, stuff, avoid and forget emotional pain, stress and/or self-hate.
If your relationship with someone suffering from Anorexia, Bulimia or Compulsive Overeating is anything other than their parent, or if your child is over the age of 18 then you cannot force them to seek help. You can support and encourage your loved one, and gently express concern, and the best thing you can do is to learn to attentively listen.
In most cases it will be important for each sufferer to find a mode of recovery that will work for them. One-on-one therapy, support groups, clinics, in-patient or out-patient, art therapy, church groups, a combination of any, or none of the above but something completely different ... there are many options out there. Share this website, help your friend or family member to gather information if they are open to your help. Be encouraging -- there can be a lot of road blocks in searching for Eating Disorder recovery so be reassuring that recovery is possible! Be there to listen and communicate.
For the Anorexic or Bulimic who exhibits any of the following signs it may be essential to encourage them into medical treatment, in-patient in a hospital, immediately: Dizziness, fatigue, black-outs, extreme temperature sensitivity, chest pains, tingling in hands or feet, blood in stools or vomit, stomach pains, incontinence or uncontrollable vomiting or diarrhea, and/or 25% or more weight loss of total average body weight in a short period of time.
There are many signs and symptoms as well as physical dangers. It is important to remember that the continued behaviors of Eating Disorders can lead to many physical problems, further emotional difficulties, and even death.
Keep in mind there isn't a lot you can do overall, as an "outsider" to a close family member or friend suffering from an Eating Disorder. It is up to the individual suffering to decide they are ready to deal with the emotional issues in their life that have lead them to their Eating Disorder. They need to make a choice for recovery and to want to do the work to get there. There is no one in their lives that can make this choice for them, they must want to do it for themselves.
For advanced cases of Anorexia and Bulimia, the course of treatment will usually begin with stabilizing the patient's health, and from there it is imperative that a course of therapy, both individual and/or group, take place. For cases in which the patient's life it not in immediate danger, it is important they seek therapy, from an experienced therapist in the area of treating eating disorders, with or without group therapy. Unfortunately, more often than not, sufferers tend to reach life threatening situations before they seek help, even if then. And in some cases, once they've come out of immediate danger and left the hospital there is no follow up of treatment, so they only find themselves back in the hospital shortly after. This can continue for years and is destructive both emotionally and physically, but the final action to get better lies in the patient's desire to get better. Often times they feel afraid to ask for help, or don't feel there is a proper forum in which to ask. More often than not, the Eating Disorder sufferer does not feel they deserve help.
