Expert: Ryan Hale - 7/18/2010

Question
QUESTION: Recently, I've been obbsessed with calories and fat, I look at every packet. I stand in front of my mirror every night thinking I'm fat and need to loose weight. I'm 11 and I weigh 3 and a half stone, is that normal? All my friends weigh 6 stone plus. I am smaller 135 to be exat but I feel like I've failed if I eat a snack in the day. I also cant stop myself from going on pro-ana websites when I dont want to. I want to be skinner than I am and never weigh more than 4 stone. I moving to year 7 soon so could you tell me how much a year 7 should weigh? Also could you help me with my problem.

ANSWER: Ella- it is impossible to tell you how much you should weigh.  You must consider body type, height, age, and activity level.  There are some good height/weight charts and the U.S. government even has a pretty good one if you Google "food pyramid."  But, these are only guidelines.  I am more concerned about your thoughts of being overweight and obsessed with calories.  One definition of addiction, is the inability to make a decision about your behavior.  Disordered eating can be like addiction in that way.  Therefore, I'd say you could do the most good by beginning to talk with a counselor about this.  There are often many aspects that play into the disorder as well such as family, work or school stress, family history and the existence of depression or anxiety that should all be addressed in order to help.  A counselor would be a great place to start.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thanks for the help but I'm not sure that I could tell my parents. It's something that I like to be kept to myself. Also a counselor is something that I've always said no to.

Answer
I know you are doing the best you can to get through life and the behaviors and thoughts help you do that.  It's scary to give those up because they are so familiar to you and serve a purpose to you.  When you are ready, I think you could be doing even better with therapy.