Expert: Jeanne Rust, PhD - 2/8/2011

Question
QUESTION: Hi, this is Lia. You've already answered my question before (recovering on my own). As you know, I'm 14 years old and I was trying to recover on my own. I went from 80 pounds to 97 the first time. Then I got scared and dropped back to 90. Since then, I've been gaining to almost 100, then dropping back the pounds again. Its happened more than 5 times; its occurring right now too. My mother wants me to be 105 lbs. but i can't do it. I can feel it in my clothes and jeans and thighs and once it starts to feel tight, I start to starve again. Its taking a toll on my family and my mother. Why can't I just stay at 95 lbs? I'm okay with that and will maintain 95 lbs. But 105? I can't, i just can't. & its starting to make me hate my life. Pls answer back soon.

ANSWER: Dear Lia,

It feels just terrible to live in really tight clothes!  This is the hardest part of recovery.  One thing you can try is to have your mother take you shopping for new clothes.  Good idea.

Most people just try to gut it out.  Every single person goes through this in recovery at the beginning -- they feel bloated, their clothes feel horrible, they begin to hate themselves -- and this is where a therapist comes in.  She/he will help you work with the psychological issues involved in an eating disorder.  It's about so much more than just the food and the weight.

Go to my site, www.mirasol.net and find Causes of Eating Disorders -- read that list and see what you come up with.  This is where you'll find out what you need to work on so that you don't need to use the eating disorder as a way of coping with stress in your life.

Please keep in touch and let me know what you find out!

Warmly,
Jeanne Rust, PhD
CEO/Founder
Mirasol, Inc.
888-520-1700
www.mirasol.net
www.edrecovery.com

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Lia again. I don't know what to do. With all the food I've now been eating, im starting to binge and purge. Before it was just purging all the food my mom gave me to gain weight (recovery meals), but now its like i have the urge to binge and purge out of nowhere. I want to get better, but i keep on saying "i'll start tomorrow" and we know where that always gets us-nowhere. Yesterday i noticed my front teeth eroding & totally freaked out, almost to the point where i was going to recover right there on the spot; but then i got scared and told myself "oh, its nothing, noone will notice" so then i went back to starving. I'm now at 90 lbs @ 5'5, but due to certain tricks(water weight), my mom thinks im @ 95/96. what do i do, i'll never tell her i began purging though.

Answer
Dear Lia,

Now you are starting to get much worse!  You say that no one notices, but I can tell immediately if someone is a bulimic by looking at them!  You are at the place with your weight where you'll start to have numerous cognitive difficulties -- which means that your ability to think clearly and to make good decisions is compromised!

Please tell your mom that you have to see a therapist -- you don't have to tell your mom anything, but tell her that you're really depressed, that you're suffering from anxiety, and that you need a therapist asap!

Try looking at the Causes of Eating Disorders     You'll be amazed!

warmly,
Jeannie