Expert: Meg - 5/26/2005

Question
Hi, I'm 22, and have been bulimic for 6 years, anorexic before that, and COE for 2 years after the bulimia.  I  am trying to overcome the COE, but know deep down that I will go back to either anorexic or bulimic.  I suffer from depression, & SI.  I cut, burn and break bones.  I am being treated for the depression, but have kept my ED a secret, although my Dr knows I've taken ipecac in the past.  I am addicted to laxatives, between 100-160 a day.  I know this number will get back down to 20 or so, it always does.  At times I feel as though I need help, but mostly I feel as though because I am obese, due to the COE, that nobody will take me seriously, or believe that I have an ED.  At times I think I don't have a problem at all, that I'm just fat & should cope with it.  Anyway, do you think I should consider treatment, & if so, would I be taken seriously?
Thanks.

Answer
Hi Chantelle,

Thanks for your note and I hope that I can be of a little help.  It sounds like you have been dealing with your eating disorders for awhile and like it has been quite a battle.  I'm sorry that you have had to go through all of this as I know how horrible it feels.

Your eating disorder is serious and really dangerous (there are so many dangers involved with laxatives that can cause death) and I absolutely think that you should seek treatment and tell your current doctor what you are going through.  It honestly has NOTHING to do with your weight and everything to do with your behaviors and how much you are suffering.  Any doctor who doesn't recognize this is not worth your time.  Seriously, I'm fairly certain that anyone who understands what you are going through with this is going to take it seriously and really want to help.  

I hate to be lame, but I feel that I have to put in a link here about laxative abuse and how serious that is.  I have known people get very sick and nearly die (and have heard of people dying) and just want to warn you as you certainly deserve to be free of all of these behaviors and feelings so that you can be healthy. And, sadly, eating disorders can kill at any weight.

Here are some links for you:
http://www.mirror-mirror.org/dangerou.htm
http://www.pale-reflections.com/methods.asp?page=lax

Sweetie, your struggles are just as valid as anyone elses and what you are doing is serious and defintely warrents speaking up and getting some help for this.  I really hope that you choose to do that.  No one deserves to live with the physical and emotional pain that accompany an eating disorder and you certainly do deserve to feel better and be okay.  

Please take care and let me know how its goes, okay?  Feel free to write again if there is anything else I can answer or further clarify.

Best,
Meg