AboutMeg Expertise I am recovinging from about nine years with my eating disorder and while I am not a psychologist, I`ve accumulated a good deal of knowlege about eating disorders as well as my own experience over this time. I`ve mainly struggled with anorexia, but have definitely had times where I have engaged in bulimic behaviors as well. I also struggle with over exercising, but am about to be certified as a personal trainer and have learned moderation as well as how to treat my body well so it can perform at it`s best. I promise to give an honest answer to anything asked, and I want to say that while it is a long, scary road---it is possible to get free of this and it is so important to keep on taking little steps and knowing that you are not alone.
Experience Sufferer for nine plus years. Also, my Mom has strugged with this issue- as have others in her side of the family.
I have a huge problem with eating.. Ive had this since about 14.. now 21.. I have depression problems too but anyway, I cannot help but look in the mirror constantly to check weither I have put on weight or not.. I weigh myself alot and starve myself when I can, I keep thinking I am fat and ugly, but people always tell me Im under weight and tiny. I would never make myself throw up because it would wreck my teeth.. I know I would do it if it didn't though. it is now late afternoon and all ive eaten today is a muesli bar. nobody takes me seriously when I try to talk about this..
Answer Hello,
Thanks for your question and I am so sorry that you are going through this. I hope that I can help or at least point you in a more helpful direction and please know that you are not alone in your suffering. Sadly, there are many women (and men) out there who are in the same boat and there is a way out of it.
That must be incredibly frusterating that no one is taking you seriously with this. Often, I think that when people are uncomfortable or don't know how to deal with a problem, they use denial (or ignoring) to pretend its not there. And, there are certainly people who think that an eating disorder is just a "phase" that one will eventually snap out of. Unfortunately, as you know, this is not the case.
If you are at all hazy about what is going on, they might reaffirm for you that you are in need of some help. And, you can always print out the results to show/talk about with someone and perhaps that will help whomever you are not getting understanding from to stop and see what is going on.
As far as getting the help you deserve, if you are in school, you might want to check with the counseling center to see if there is anyone with whom you can talk or if they have any eating disorer support groups. Because of how commonplace they have become, most universities do have some type of help for this. If not, you might want to try ANAD, which offers free support groups and I believe there are chapters around the world. I've been to a few of their groups and found it really helpful, as have other girls that I've know.
Also, although I know that most people are a little resistant, I would really recommend trying to find some sort of help if this is at all an option. Eating disorders are really complex and often deep rooted and they can be incredibly difficult to overcome on your own (not to say that its not possible, but it really makes it harder and a longer process). You sound like an intelligent girl with a lot going for you and you do NOT deserve to feel this badly about yourself or to lose any more time feeling fat and ugly when you are not. And, there are often many underlying issues involved with EDs as well that can get in the way of you living the wonderful life that you deserve.
I hope that this helped at least a little and please take good care and feel free to write again if there is anything else I can answer or further clarify.
