Expert: Meg - 2/28/2004

Question
Hi, I'm a 18 year old girl who has struggled with weight... I was 120lbs and 5'2", I guess I wasn't really fat, but chubby nontheless. So I decided to diet two years ago and now I'm only 82lbs... I'm not anorexic, but I have this unrealistic and unrepressable fear of being fat, so I'm always on the watchout for what I eat, counting calories and refusing to let any "fattening food" enter my body. I usually have 1200 cals aday but I think I really need to gain some weight. What is the best way to do so? I don't want to put on pounds and pounds of fat on my body, how much should I eat a day and what kind exercise should help?
Thank you for listening to me, and looking forward for ur advise^^  

Answer
Hi there Lai-

I'm glad that you wrote and hope that I can help you a bit as well as point you towards some online resources that you might find helpful.

First of all, its great that you have come to see that you are at an unhealthy weight (and an anorexic one) and that in order to be healthy, you need to make some changes.  Major props to you, as its not easy to be able to admit that.

Given your low weight, your weight loss over the past few years, your restrictive diet and your fears of being fat/eating "non fattening" foods, it sounds to me like you do have an eating disorder and for this reason, I'd really encourage you to reach out and find some means of help.  It is so difficult to fight ed's alone-and especially when the thinking is getting ingrained after a few years.  I don't know if you're familiar with the Something's Fishy website on Eating Disorders, but it is a great resource with lots of information as well as a treatment finder that has everything from free support groups to counselors to hospitals.  So, I'd recommend checking it out so that you can get some further info.  The web address is: www.something-fishy.org

That said, the best thing you can do for yourself is to work with a nutritionist or dietician who can help plan a healthy diet for you so that your body can slowly regain any weight that you need to in order to be healthy again.  The reason I recommend this is that they generally can not only help you find a good plan that is specifically tailored for you, but can also help to calm some of your fears about foods that you may be uncomfortable with by helping you better understand nutrition and how what we eat really effects us physcially and mentally.

I know that money or having to admit to your parents so that they can help you work with a dietician can be difficult, but I highly recommend it.  That said, if this is not a possibility for you right now, I would recommend SLOWLY encorperating some new foods to your list of what you will eat and slowly raising your calorie level to a bit higher.  Teenage women generally need a minimum of 1800-and this is if you are not active...so although it can feel pretty overwhelming, slow is the way to go.  You can find helpful information on www.self.com or do a general internet search for nutrition and get some healthy meal plans so that you can figure out what is a more normal way to eat.  I know its scary, but I also know you can do it.

In terms of exercise, I would be careful at your low weight of exercising too much as you don't have much stored energy to rely on and its probably best to work on getting a little more physically healthy before you really start exercising.  That said, exercise is absolutely a great way to relax and deal with stress and something like taking a walk or doing yoga would probably be of good benefit to you now.  Then,  as you get healthier and stronger, you can add other supplementary activites.

I hope this helped a bit and please feel free to contact me again if there is anything more I can help you with.

Take care and again, way to go on making some healthy/positive changes for yourself.

Best,
Meg