Expert: Susan Downes - 8/6/2007

Question
i'm trying to recover from anorexia which started since june this year. Since it has only been 2 months, would it be easier to repair the possible metabolic damages? Currently, i consume about 700 calories per day, in 3 to 5 different meals. I exercise 4 times a week, working off about 400 calories each time. I do feel satisfied after the meals even if they were low in calories. However, i would really like to bring it back up to a healthy 1,200calories so that my menstrual cycle can return. It has stopped ever since june, and im seriously freaking out now. How can I bring my calorie intake back up to the healthy 1,200cal without gaining weight? Is it even possible? Will I have to exercise more?

Answer
Hi Veronica, Congratulations on facing the problem head on . You did not mention how old you are, but that may have some bearing on your questions. What I would recommend to you is to stop getting on the scale. Stop looking at your body in the mirror. Stop counting calories, grams of fat... Stop all of that compulsive type of behaviors that got you in trouble in the first place. You are not going to make any significant gains if you are full of worry either. Send me a follow up and let me know when this all began. How old were you, and what was happening in your life at that time that made you feel a need to take back some form of control? There is usually a trigger point in our lives when we become anorexic or begin any kind of eating disorder. It can be as small as somebody making a comment that was hurtful, or as big as the loss or death of a loved one, a divorce in the family... We begin to feel like our lives are spinning out of control. We desperately want to take back some of that control, but we go about it the wrong way without even knowing it. Eating disorders are not just about food, you know what I mean. Think about it. That is what you need to grasp. If you do not, you may end up substituting one compulsive behavior with another. Just reread your message to me and think about how much you wrote about calories, weight, exercise, metabolism...but did not tell me anything about what got you twisted up inside to begin with. This is where we begin to make progress; we get a hold of the event or trauma that made us begin to think badly about our self-image, we forgive ourselves for abusing our bodies, we talk about ways to heal those wounds, and as we heal inside the weight becomes normal. You are going to be just fine.` It sounds like you are on the right track. When I was in college I was training in bodybuilding, became the state champion, and was heading to nationals. My life was a eat to bulk up, starve to get ripped for a show, constant roller coaster. But I never even knew back then that I had an eating disorder, nobody talked about it and it was not until Karen Carpenter died that anyone even started using the word anorexia in public. I know, I am aging myself, but feel comfortable telling you. Because you have been there and back, you can surely help others as you will recognize the signs. I am so glad that you are feeling self assured and your self confidence is getting better.  Keep up the good work. There have been times in my life when the anorexia would rear it's ugly head, usually when I least expected it, and I have to still be on guard. I must remember to take very good care of myself physically, emotionally, spiritually, all of the time. Your metabolism will return to normal as you get the proper balance of nutrients, electrolytes, and have good weight. Once your body feeds it's internal organs, skin, muscles, bones...you will begin your normal cycle again. But it may take some time and be erratic at first. Do not overdo the exercise, it can become compulsive. Eat frequently, eat well, eat when you are hungry and when you are not hungry. Don't count calories, grams of fat...just eat and eat healthy. If you have a family doctor that you feel comfortable with, talk about it. Please try to think of the problem that hurt you in the beginning, causing you to develop this behavior. Get rid of any negative self-talk, and negative feelings. You are a good person and the shell we wear on the outside (our bodies) are not who we truly are as a person. Thank you so much for sharing your inner self with me. It has been such a pleasure. If you ever need me, remember that I am here to listen. You sound like a great woman and it has been a pleasure to get to know you a bit. Leave me some feedback, a nomination if you wish, and keep in touch. Helping others get through an eating disorder is very rewarding. We volunteer our time on this website to help others. Hearing about your successes is our reward for staying up late at night to answer questions. The more you can help others, the better you will feel. Take good care of the wonderful you. Thank you. Regards, Susan