Expert: Joanne - 11/3/2007

Question
I've had an eating disorder for a few years now and recently ive been really down and upset about it. I want to get help from someone, and was considering telling my teacher.
The only problem is I'm really shy and don't know how to tell him or what to say!
Can you give me any advice?
thanks.

Answer
Louise,

I think what you are about to hopefully do is a very brave move, and wish you luck in finding the courage to go through with it.

It can be hard - I was very shy at school, and think I would have struggled actually bringing it up out of 'nowhere'.  Thankfully I was asked out right about mine, and then left to come back and admit to it when I was ready (which I did the very next day in fact).

I think that you just need to think of this as a step that is necessary.  You need to do this to be able to move on with your life.  You just need to stress to yourself just how important this conversation could be for your future, and I'm sure that you will get it out somehow.

I would make sure to catch your teacher at a time that he can give you the time that you need - over lunchtime, after school, or through an appointment time if you are able to book appointments with your teacher.  Just sit down and tell him what is worrying you most, and then work back to the details.  If you feel that your schoolwork is suffering, this may be a good way to bring it up.  Mention that you feel lately that you are struggling at school, and that you believe you know the reason, and really would like some help in sorting it.  Or if he is a teacher that you feel that you can confide in, it may be just as easy to let him know outright what is going on.

No matter how you bring it up, be honest with him about everything.  If he asks you a question about what you are doing, or why you are doing it, how it makes you feel, etc, be as honest and open as you can be - he can only help you if he knows exactly what is going on.

I urge you to do this, and do it soon!  This is one of the best decisions that I believe you can ever make.  It is also very hard, but it will be worth it - even if you don't notice the difference until well into the future!

Please come back and let me know how it goes, and please feel free to come back and ask absolutely anything!

All the best
Holly