Expert: Meg - 12/18/2006

Question
Hi i am a 16 year old girl who is 5'9 and 140 and i HATE my weight i am huge and fat and i feel like eveeryone critisizes me for being this big. I really watch what i eat and i try to eat under 1000 calories a day. i have been watching what i eat for a long time now and i dont get my menstruel cyle for months at a time (i kind of like it) i also used to take laxitives but i stopped that becuase someone found out . i just realllly hate my body and i wish i would weight 115lbs (thats my goal) i hope to reach it in two months i will DO ANYTHING to reach this. i workout almost 2 hours a day what more can i do? i also have a fear of eating in front of people i dont know why but i do. ah i just dont know whats wrong with me (if there is something wrong i dont know?) i just dontlike having to worry about all this i wish i was skinny.

Answer
Hi Kelly,

Thanks for your question and I hope that I can be of some help.  I'm sorry that you are dealing with this right now and hope that you can take some steps towards feeling better about your weight and body.  And, I know that is not easy to do.

It sounds to me like you definitely are struggling with an eating disorder.  If you are still unsure about this, you might want to try the following quizzes:


http://www.msnbc.com/modules/quizzes/eating_profiler.asp?cp1=1

http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/Eating_Disorders/concernedcounseling/eat...

Many of the symptoms you mention occur with anorexia and not giving your body the calories or nutrients that you need.  I can guarantee you that 1000 calories is too few for someone your age and height and also that 2 hours a day of exercise is excessive.  You are always within a healthy/thin weight range for your height so I think what you need to look at is what is causing you to want to get to 115?  What do you think will happen with your life once you do?  (ie: What will be different?)  When you figure this out, you will probably be on the way to understanding what is behind your eating disorder.  It might be helpful to speak with a counselor as well or at least let someone you trust (a parent, etc) in on what is going on so that they can help as well.

I know that you probably think, "But *I* don't have an eating disorder, I'm just fat."  That response alone is enough to tell you that there is a problem as you are NOT fat and your behaviors (rigid dieting, wanting to be way too underweight, taking laxatives, obsessing, overexercising) are all symptoms of having one.

Good luck to you and I hope that you continue to think about this and take steps to get healthier.  You deserve it.

Best,
Meg