Expert: Ralph Salier - 8/26/2009

Question
1- how can we deal with the shy teen who has difficulty at expressing him/herself?
2- what is the good advice to deal with the violent teen?
3- what is the good way to deal with the hopeless teen ?


Answer
Hi Roua,

First of all I am not a qualified Psychiatrist and I am not a Psychologist.  I am an Anthropologist and different cultures with troubled teens have different methods for dealing with them.  In the US for instance, the parents of the child may seek guidance from a doctor, teacher, clergy person or others.  In the case of #2 and 3 may seek the help of law enforcement, the court system, institutions, or other providers to help the child.  

A shy person may just be part of the child's personality and may need some guidance in growing out of this self view point.  A shy child may also be frightened, may have low self esteem, may have been abused (especially in females), may be depressed etc... Some parents may seek the guidance as mentioned above.  In the Middle East, with all of the warfare, destruction, fear etc... Shyness is not surprising.  There is a great deal of trauma associated with this and may lead to the withdrawal of a child.  It can also lead to anger and violence and hopelessness/depression. Often parents are not aware of the cause for this behavior in their children but it could be as simple as watching the TV and having to confront the scenes of death and destruction on a daily basis.  

Are you in one of these situations? Are you the child or the parent?  In either case if you are confronted with these issues, seek help.