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Arab Culture/Intimacy in Marriage/Syrian man and American woman

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Expert: - 1/10/2012


Question
I have been married to a 36-year-old Christian Syrian man for a year, but he has only gotten his visa to the US and been here for 1/2 a year.
Despite passionate internet exchanges and a few visits to Syria, this is the first we have been together for an extended period of time.
I am troubled by his lack of physical intimacy-he rarely shows affection, speaks of love even less often and does not want frequent sex.
I need to know if this is a cultural difference between us (as he states), or if it is a personal problem just with us. Is there truly such a divide between men and women in Syria that he does not know how to relate to a wife?

Answer
Rebecca, it is not a cultural issue. I would suggest marriage counseling to learn the real reason why the lack of intimacy. Arab men (myself included) do not show public affection, but that doesnt mean we are not intimate or affectionate behind closed doors.  

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David Rababy

Expertise

Questions regarding political, military and cultural issues in the Middle East

Experience

•27+ years of experience in intelligence analysis •Coordinated the management, analysis, processing, and dissemination of strategic, operational and tactical intelligence •Conducted research & analysis of counterterrorism, and foreign military forces, operations, capabilities and trends in support of threat production •Analyzed information to assess developments, trends, and threat implications within geographical and functional areas •Compiled, collated, analyzed, produced and evaluated all-source intelligence •Subject Matter Expert on Middle East affairs (native of Lebanon)

Organizations
Disabled American Veterans (DAV) National Veteran-Owned Business Association Veterans of Foreign Wars (VFW) The American Legion The Marine Corps League The Association of Service Disabled Veterans (ASDV) Fredericksburg Small Business Association (FSBA)

Publications
Rababy, D.A., Marine Corps Intelligence, Officer Training of the Future, U.S. Army Military Intelligence magazine, May 1995 Rababy, D.A., Intelligence Support During a Humanitarian Mission, Marine Corps Gazette, February 1995 Rababy, D.A., Intelligence Support in Operations Other Than War, Small Wars Journal, October, 2005 Rababy, D.A., Cultural Intelligence Training for Military Operations, Ongoing

Education/Credentials
American Military University, Master of Arts, Political Science University of Michigan-Flint, Bachelor of Arts, History Armed Forces Staff College (JPME II) Intelligence Collection Managers Course USMC Command & Staff College Anti-terrorism Instructor Course Instructor and Curriculum Developers Course

Awards and Honors
Bronze Star Medal Joint Meritorious Service Medal Meritorious Service Medal (Third Award) Navy and Marine Corps Commendation Medal (Third Award) Combat Action Ribbon (Second Award) Armed Forces Expeditionary Medal Southwest Asia Service Medal Kuwait Liberation Medal (Kuwait and Saudi Arabia) Navy and Marine Corps Intelligence Instructor of the Year (1996)

Past/Present Clients
Jane's Information Group Klein Associates (ARA) Robotic Research

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