Expert: Elder Greg Madden - 2/5/2010

Question
QUESTION: Hello Sir,

Whether or not salvation can be lost is of much debate.  I don't really know how to phrase my question, so let me just tell you my story.  

I became a believer nearly 10 years ago, at age 19 - and at first I was a very fruitful christian.  I loved God's word, I ate up anything that had to do with [biblical] Christianity - books, movies, whatever.  I loved to fellowship with and encourage others, witness obviously be in church.  I was a different person all around; everyone saw it, and I felt it. However, two years into my walk with Christ a pattern started, a pattern of habitual backsliding.  I would go back into my old life - partying, drinking & some drugs (marijuana, and later cocaine for a short time).  God restored me every time, as if nothing ever happened.  But then, 6 years ago I went off on God like  no one else in all of human history.  Screaming at the top of my lungs I called all 3 parts of the Godhead every name in the book, and then took it further by saying that all of the trinity was evil, of the devil, demonic, the resurrection was evil and of the devil, I hate you, I don't want you, never come back no matter how much I beg; I invite the devil into my life I am a child of the devil, I sell my soul to Satan, and serve Satan, I denounce God.  The entire time I heard a voice inside my head saying: "stop, stop stop" - but the more I heard it, the more I kept going, & I had the most sinister laugh coming out of me - as if I was getting away with something..  At this time I wasn't aware of an unforgivable sin, at least I don't remember being aware of it. Within 3-5 minutes I calmed down and came to my senses, realizing what a stupid thing I had done.  I prayed to God and said I was sorry.  I thought everything was OK  However, I don't remember if it was the same day, or a couple days later that I had the words: "blasphemy of the Holy Spirit" come across my mind, and not knowing what it was I looked it up when I got home.  What I found naturally terrified me.  To make matters worse, when this all started I went to church to seek God, & as I was praying before the preaching started, I saw myself standing before a blinding light (I remember feeling very afraid), and all of a sudden I was set aflame.  I'm told not put too much stock in visions, but that's the only one I ever had, and it has fearfully stuck with me all these years.  

For the next 6 years I researched the unpardonable sin exhaustively, and to this day I don't know if I've committed it.  For years I just was sure that no matter what I did I was going to hell, so to make myself feel better, I started to deny God willfully - there is no God, there is no hell; there is nothing to worry about.  I started to agree with the arguments of my atheist friends, and just live life.  But I know God is real, I saw what He did in my life, and remember how joyful He made me feel.  Problem is that every time I go into a church I feel depressed and condemned; I get anxiety and panic attacks all the time at any point in thw day.  I'm not sure if what I have done is unforgivable, but I hope an unforgivable sin is not just a 1-time slip of the tongue. Along with the panic attacks, anxiety depression, I have unwanted thoughts of doubt and unbelief...that doesn't make sense, does it? - because I know God exists.  The best way I could describe it is my mind is divided; one side believes, but the other has thoughts of an atheist. It's as if I have to re convince myself of what I know to be real.  I want to believe, but for some reason I can't.  This is why I'm afraid that the Holy Spirit has indeed left me; it is He who empowers a person to believe.  How can He still be with me after what I have done & the thoughts that I now have?  I pray, and as I am praying, I'm thinking: "this is pointless, God is not real".  Or: "well, there's a lot of evidence for God, but what if we're all wrong?...."  And yet, I fear standing before Him & going to hell.

I've prayed for the Lord to give me a new mind and a new heart, but nothing is happening.  I just want to believe, as I once did, feel the joy and security, & see God in my life.  Faith is not a feeling, but sensing the Holy Spirt's comfort, joy, peace, or His guidance is. I no longer hear that little voice saying: "witness to that person" & when I do try to witness the verses just don't come to mind; it's as if I'm forcing it & doing it in my own power.  I don't know how much longer I can put up with the anxiety, panic attacks & depression.  I'm failing in school because I can't concentrate on anything else.  Please pray and help!

Sincerely,

Ralf Rybak

ANSWER: Ralf,

Thank you for your questions, and the opportunity to help. First, let me assure you that right after I read your question I brought you before the Lord Jesus in prayer. Second, know that I will continue to be in prayer with, and for you.

Know this Ralf, that you are not alone. Many of us have failed God miserably. It matters not to what degree (in man's eyes) we may have sinned, sin is still sin! We have all "...failed and fallen short of the glory of God". Every Christian has at one time or another in their spiritual walk with the Lord, failed. All Believers, no matter how spiritual they may seem, have thoughts that cross their mind that are wrong and sinful. Does mean they are lost? NO! It is just another reminder that ever though we are saved/born-again, we are still in the flesh and therefore subject to failure.

No you cannot "loose" your salvation, but you can forfeit it. Yes there is a vast difference. To "loose" ones salvation is likened to "loosing your keys" or if you will "miss-placing" something. You don't say "Now where did I lay my salvation at. I know it's got to be here somewhere." This is just silly.

You see, as a "recovering Calvinist" I have heard the doctrine of unconditional eternal security preached so strong that I literally have heard preacher say that those who have been saved, even if they are in the very act of adultery, if the Lord should return at that very moment, that they would be raptured into heaven. This is simply un-Biblical!

On the other hand, the Bible does teach us that every Christian will be persevered unto the end and be saved because of the power of Gods grace pledged for their support. The Bible teaches us that any saved person who has sinned (backslidden), but has a desire to repent, may do so and be restored to God's favor and fellowship. However, since man continues to have free choice, it is possible because of temptations and the weakness of human flesh for him to fall into the practice of sin and to make shipwreck of his faith and be lost once again.
Scripture References: I Timothy 1:18,19; John 15:1-7; Colossians 1:21-23; Hebrews 3:14; 2 Peter 2:20,21

The Bible clearly states that we are saved by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8) and that the just shall live by faith (Hebrews 10:38; Romans 1:17; Galatians 3:11; Habakkuk 2:4). As the believer's salvation is received, not by an act of righteousness but by an act of faith, so the believer's salvation is maintained, not by acts of righteousness but by a life of faith.

His spiritual growth varies in excellence and degree according to the yieldedness and attention he affords to the Spirit who is at work within him. Yet all the while as the perfecting processes go on, he is credited with the perfection through the imputed righteousness of Christ by faith. Through the process of "becoming conformed" he is secure; his salvation is sure. "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus" (Romans 8:1).

God does not let anyone go easily. (See Romans 10:21 where Paul was speaking of Israel, but the principle applies.) But a believer can be lost if he disregards the continuing checks of the Holy Spirit and reaches the point where he rejects Jesus as his Savior.

It is possible to believe for a while and in time of temptation to fall away (Luke 8:13). It is possible for the weak brother to perish for whom Christ died (1 Corinthians 8:11). It is possible for a name to be written in the Book of Life and then removed from the Book (Revelation 22:19).

You may be asking "Then at what point does a true Christian then forfeit their salvation?" A Christian forfeits their salvation through the same means they receive their salvation. The Biblical means of salvation is "by grace through faith" (Rom. 10:9,10; Eph. 2:8,9). It is received by believing faith, therefore it is forfeited by unbelief.

However, it is not always possible to determine whether a person has already turned his back on Jesus as his Savior. Therefore it is well to leave judgment of these matters in the hands of the omniscient God. Of this we can be certain, however; if God does not give up in His efforts to bring the prodigal back, neither should the church of Jesus Christ. Too often people write off an individual when God has not written him off at all.

As to wether or not you have committed the "unpardonable sin", I cannot say. However, let me share with you what I have shared with others who have asked the same question...

It is sobering to realize that the One who introduced the subject of a sin that can never be pardoned is the only Person in the world who is capable of forgiving sin — our Lord Jesus Christ, the Savior of all men.

In Matthew 12:31,32, the Lord Jesus declared that "blasphemy or speaking profanely against the Holy Spirit" is the sin for which there was neither forgiveness in this world or the world to come. Thus, whoever is guilty of committing such a sin is "subject to eternal condemnation" (Mark 3:29, NKJV).

It is vital that we understand the role of the Holy Spirit in God’s plan of salvation in order to grasp the Savior’s meaning of how one sins against the Holy Spirit. Only through the ministry of the Holy Spirit can a person know conviction of sin (John 16:8), be drawn to God (John 6:44; Revelation 22:17), and receive a revelation of the saving work of the cross of Christ (1 Corinthians 1:18; 2:14).

Those who deliberately reject the only means by which God’s grace is mediated to lost sinners remove themselves from the only source of pardon provided by divine mercy. When Christ is willfully rejected, the Scripture states, "There no longer remains a sacrifice for sins" (Hebrews 10:26). Such a sin is called unpardonable because the basis for pardon has been rejected.

Blaspheming the Holy Spirit is described as "insulting the Spirit of grace" (Hebrews 10:29). For when a person with full understanding of what he or she is doing "tramples the Son of God underfoot, and counts the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified a common thing," the Holy Spirit is denied the opportunity to administer the grace and pardon of Christ.

Regarding the unpardonable sin, J. Oswald Sanders wrote in his Bible Studies in Matthew’s Gospel: "These things should be noted: (1) It is a calculated sin, not one of impulse. (2) It is a sin of knowledge, not ignorance, but a sin against spiritual knowledge and light (Hebrews 10:26,32). (3) It is not an isolated act but a habitual attitude. (4) It is a sin of the heart, not merely of the intellect or the tongue. (5) It is a sin of finality — complete rejection of Christ." The harsh term "blasphemy" indicates a deliberate and godless rejection of the saving power and grace of God.

Unfortunately, the devil has led some people to believe they have committed the unpardonable sin. People who are fearful they have committed such a sin would do well to heed the words of William Barclay: "The person who cannot have committed the sin against the Holy Spirit is the person who fears he/she has, for the sin against the Holy Spirit can be truly described as the loss of all sense of sin" (The Gospel of Matthew, Volume 2, p.50). The capacity to have concern regarding whether or not one has committed the unpardonable sin is a certain indicator the person has not done so.

So to be clear about the last paragraph, someone who fears they have committed the unpardonable sin, but has a desire to repent and be right with God, can know that is one proof that one has not. A person who did commit this sin would never again even desire to be right with God.

Ralf, you expressed a longing to "...believe, as I once did, feel the joy and security, %26 see God in my life." I would like to suggest a few web pages that are on our personal ministry web site that will help you in your spiritual journey back to the place with the Lord you once had...

The first is addressing salvation itself. You indicated that you had repented and asked the Lord to forgive you. This is great! But I would like for you to read through this brief page and make for certain in your own spirit that you have made everything right...

http://www.forministry.com/USOKPENTEMMM1/HowtobecomeaChristian.dsp

Second, though you asked this question in the "Assembly of God" category, I did not read anywhere in your question where or not you had received the Holy Spirit baptism? If have not, or if you are unfamiliar with this term, please read through the following pages. The first page is a brief introduction to the Spirit baptism and will help you understand what it means and how to receive it. The next page is a rather lengthy Biblical explanation of the Holy Spirit baptism...

http://www.forministry.com/USOKPENTEMMM1/TheBaptismoftheHolyGhost.dsp

http://www.forministry.com/USOKPENTEMMM1/WhattheBiblesSaysabouttheHolyGhostBapti

Lastly, this page is a great Bible study titled "Victory Over Sin" that will help in your everyday walk with Christ...

http://www.forministry.com/USOKPENTEMMM1/VictoryOverSin.dsp

Once again Ralf, after you have read through this answer and the links I suggested please feel free to contact me with any further question or comments you may have.

God Bless,
Elder Greg Madden

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hi Greg,

Thank you for your quick reply, in-dept insight & sharing of resources/links.

In answer to your 1st question and accompanying link - yes, I believe I have taken the appropriate steps to repent.  I still have this nagging thought of doubt, but hope that as I read the bible, it'll simply cease.  I don't want to have any unbelief in me...at the same time, it's just too amazing that we have a God who loves us.

2nd, yes I believe I received the Holy Spirit at the moment of salvation; I was baptized in water about a year later.  I most definitely could use a refilling though!

I want & need to see evidence of God in my life; once that starts happening.  Yes, I have walked away from Him & willfully sinned - but I don't want to stay in this condition.  whether salvation can or cannot be lost is irrelevant at this point (I think/hope) - as long as I want to come back to Him, I hope He is willing to provide a way.  Is there a cure for a hardened heart?

I'm clinging onto Philippians 1:6.

Answer
Ralf,

I was pleased to read that I was able to be of some help to you. But just so that we are clear, you said in answer to my second question to you about the Holy Spirt baptism that "...yes I believe I received the Holy Spirit at the moment of salvation...". It is true that the Holy Spirit does indwell us at the very moment of salvation. However, my question was not wether you received the Holy Spirit at salvation, but have you received the Holy Spirit baptism? The reason I ask is that this is an important key for you to use in your walk with Christ. So did you read through the links? The "Holy Ghost Baptism" and "Victory Over Sin" links are a must read for you! I feel that these will be a vital in helping you cure your "hardened heart".

It is also very important that you understand that Christs finished work on the Cross should be the focus of your faith. What He did on the Cross is more that just provided salvation to all who believe. It was there that Jesus has provided for all His children everything we would need for victory over (as the old saying goes) the world, the flesh, and the devil.

Also, have you found a good, Spirit-filled, Bible preaching church in your local area to go to? If not, send me a question (marked private) and let me know your general area and perhaps I can help.

God bless. Please stay in touch!

Elder Greg Madden