Expert: Brian Thompson - 6/13/2010

Question
hi, a couple of months ago i got back to church after being out of church for like a year and a half. everything is gone pretty well, thanks to the lord's mercy. but three weeks ago i did something that has have me thinking of leaving my church and finding another one. whenever i was in the world i used to committed several sins right, but whenever i was not congregating i started practicing some of these sins again, one of them was  masturbation and putting on make up and dressing with girls clothes. Three weeks a ago i fell into temptation and did exactly this what i am talking to you about. my problem is: do you know about that thing girls use to make the eyelashes appear longer i used that and apparently it made my eyelashes look longer. i washed my face and try to forget this happened. but in church a girl a talked to a lot kind of notice and told me 'juan you know you have long eyelashes' i said 'oh really you think so?' and she added 'yeah you have eyelashes like a girl' at first i thought well this is not so bad girls eyelashes look 'pretty' in a way. but then i remember that i used this thing and felt bad about it, so i started wondering if other brothers at the church could or have noticed that my eyelashes were long but the thing that worried me more was what would they think of me. i don't know if anyone has notice but if they have what would they have thought of me? i kept asking myself.
so in my desperation 3 days ago in my restroom i decided to use a scissor and cut the very tip of my eyelashes to reduce their length. i thought no one would notice this to my surprised a sister that drove me home last night from church asked me 'brother have you cut your eyelashes' i just said  'i thought they were falling off and decided to make then even' my question is do you think i have ruined my testimony in the church thanks to this? should i go to another church from know on? i mean there is a possibility they didn't notice and if they did notice they could have thought anything from: (me being  metro sexual or one of the so called 'pretty boys' that put on make up in high school or probably  and the one that  i worry about that they thought i was gay)
I hope you can give me a word  that can help me  this is not a joke all this is serious i know there is some people that likes to joke around asking question. Thank you sir.

Answer
Hi juan

I see you are confused. Firstly since you say you are not gay, you should avoid behaving in a gay manner. The word of God is clear about men not wearing womens clothes etc.

As to your testimony, your testimony refers to what God has done for you, not the sins you have committed. You have not committed the unforgiveable sin but repentance is needed and that means a complete committment to Christ and leaving these things behind.

Church is a place of fellowship and refuge so you have to be willing to be upfront with those you know and not run and hide. This is the way you have victory,  confess your sins and recieve forgiveness