Expert: Bill Hajdu - 7/26/2009

Question
QUESTION: Dear Bill,
I am a 42 year-old woman, born February 8 1967 at about 4pm.  This makes me an Aquarian Fire Horse.  I have had plenty of relationships in my life but have never managed to settle down, get married or have children with anybody.  I would love to do this but am getting more worried the older I get that it will be too late.  What sign would be ideal mate be? In terms of Chinese and Western astrological sign? I have recently started chatting online with someone born January 29 1973 which makes him an Aquarian Water Rat.  I have been reading how unlucky a Horse and Rat pairing is supposed to be in Chinese astrology.  Should i not even meet up with him on a first date? Does love not conquer all?
Yours sincerely and with all best wishes,
A rather frustrated Aquarian Fire Horse

ANSWER: Hi Ali,

Yes, what you have read about the Horse and Rat is correct. There is, unfortunately, even more to it than that.

In the Chinese language, the characters for Fire and Water are combined to make the word, disaster. So, your elements are also a bad match. The combination of Fire Horse and Water Rat is a perfect match for a fatal attraction. From a Chinese Astrology perspective it would be wise to not even meet up with him on a first date.

You should know the Horse lady is the lady most likely to prefer the company of men to women; however, she is ironically the most likely to have a difficult time establishing and maintain a long term relationship with one man. A positive thing about the Horse lady is she is also more likely to keep her looks and vitality longer than other women.

This last point means you are right in pairing with a younger guy. It also means you could do better at having children at a later age. So, no, it's not too late.

Given the Horse lady's natural difficulty with finding a life mate, it behooves you more than ladies of other signs to go by the book. In your case that means finding a partner born in the year of the Dog, four years younger, year of the Sheep, one year younger, or year of the Tiger, four years older.

From what I know about biology, you do need to have a sense of urgency. On the other hand, you don't need to feel desperate either. The Horse lady has some great qualities, often not appreciated by men. I don't know if it applies in your case, but one thing to watch is to exercise a little care in not intimidating men. That is often easy for a Horse lady to do. One other thing, you need to make sure your guy has a good sex drive.

If you would like to know more about relationships, I highly recommend Shelly Wu's Chinese Sexual Astrology. Also, please visit my web site, www.onlinechineseastrology.com. If you would like a detailed analysis of your relationship, you can order one at the site for a modest charge. Finally, you might want to join the Fire Horse group at yahoogroups.com. You will find some nice people there, some of whom are in your situation.

Thank u for your question.


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Dear Bill,
Thankyou for your insight.  I have another question. How would you rate the compatibility between Fire Horse (born 8 Feb 1967) and Metal Dog (born 9 Feb 1970). I would be very grateful if you could answer this. Best wishes, Ali

Answer
Hi Ali,

You were born during the year of the Fire Horse, month of the Metal Ox and day of the Water Rabbit.

He was born during the year of the Metal Dog, month of the Earth Tiger and day of the Metal Monkey.

From a Chinese Astrology perspective this match has a 45% favorable, compatibility rating, slightly below average. It could work, but it will require a lot of effort and compromise from both of you.

Although your year signs are a great match, your other signs do not go well together. The month signs, Ox and Tiger, clash. This is indicative of lots of clashes of wills. You will both have to be more compromising than you'd like. Over time this could create stress on the relationship.

You will both have to decide whether the positives, and when it's good this match can be very good, are worth the occasional hassles.

Thank u for your question.