Expert: Susan Dunn, Dating Coach - 1/15/2008

Question
QUESTION:  i find some just aren,t attracted to certain girls,i pick all the wrong guys my age and older o,d perfer older about 33 years old.any guy i have like wouldn,t consider because i am fat and ugly looking as i get older i seem get a lot fatter which make me feel worse.the real thin guys don,t want to be seen on a nightclub floor with a fat ,ugly girl like me and that was the case with me.he didn,t want seen with me on floor and he certainly didn,t want to kiss or acknlowede me the day after.he seem perfer a younger girl who is pretty ,tall ,slim, i like a lot guys who give the same tratedment. they cerain who just arent to me .some one you like might not fancy you no matter how well you look or how nice you ,they seem don,t facny me.they let me pretty sharply this has been going a 11 years with no succes.i,v tred losing weight ,i am still living at hoome in a very small town in ireland.and my da is telling me what to do and how it should be done,i still can,t drive.   life is exceply tough for me that i have absoulty no life what so ever.nearly 30 yaers old.who never even experence her first kiss i am shy and quiet.i feel even i bother with guy i am still going to be rejected no guy wants to be seen with fat and ugly ,shy and quiet girl like me. guys rejected no matter what i do. i have no friends not even one i have none at all.only me i feel things will never improve for no matter how hard i try. i live ireland

ANSWER: Have you been to college?

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: WHAT THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN

Answer
That there are other things in life besides men.  I'm sorry you've had bad experiences with men, that you dislike your appearance, and that have no friends.  You said therapy has not helped you, so I don't know what to say.  Part of maturing is love life, yes, but also work, getting a job.  So I asked if you have been to college.

It is sad to feel things will not improve.  Sometimes we have to keep the faith, and keep things going in the right direction, one step at a time. In this case, you could work on learning to drive, getting more education, getting a job - then you could get out more and maybe meet someone then, but whether you did or did not, you would still have accomplished some wonderful things that would enrich your life.

All the best,
Susan