Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 1/15/2009

Question
QUESTION: I have now been on three dates with this girl - one lunch and two dinner. Last time I went to an expensive one cos that was all that was available. She flirted and said how attractive I was. She came back to mine and we had some fun but not all the way as she was coming on and she wouldn't stay the night cos she didn't know me well enough and didn't want to go the whole way.  We vaguely arranged lunch the next  day, which I suggested. I rang her as needed to know, but she couldn't make it as a friend was having man troubles but it wouldn't be fun as she had heard it before. She said she would ring and we would go out on wed/ thur as not sure when she was meeting her uni friend. I haven't heard and was wondering if I have been too keen and scared her off or is this the dating game? What do you think and what should I do? She is 34  and I don't know if I wait for her to ring or can I ring her. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

ANSWER: Hello!

Don't expect her to call you. It's not her job - and she knows it.

Women will often suggest that they call you for a later date when they've had to cancel one. This is her way of making up for the cancellation. However, it's not her job to call and set-up dates (unless, interestingly, you demand it, but that's a story for another time), it's yours this early in the game.

So, I suggest you give her until next week. Let her stew just a little and then call her on Monday to set something up for Saturday. Don't mention her lack of call, just realize that she knows it's not her job - yet.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
BAM! TV
818.334.8826
http://beingaman.com
http://beingaman.tv
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
Producers of "BAM! TV"

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Thanks! She texted me saying "how was my week? she was at home with flu bug- such a bore xx' .  Thought I would text saying 'Had a really good week. Sorry to hear you aren't well but let's catch up when you are better." Then presumably I ring the middle of next week?
P.S. I have no idea why I am over analysing!

Answer
Hello again!

Yes, do that.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
BAM! TV
818.334.8826
http://beingaman.com
http://beingaman.tv
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
Producers of "BAM! TV"