Expert: L.E. Coleman - 3/30/2009

Question
Hi there!!!

So, i kinda have this huge crush on this guy who waits for the same bus as i am at the same bus stop. He's older than me, I'm 19 and i think he's around 28-29 years old. I know it's weird but something about him really attracts me.
I always bump into him, like 2 times in a week, and i'm always looking forward to see him!!!

Can i know how to do the first move to really get to know him more???I think it's okay to smile to him and greet him but how can i know more about him, like what time he goes to work usually and what time he finish, so i can see him more. And he stays somewhere around my house, as he stop at the same stop as me, but he had to take the alley to go back there. I know it's weird to ask him that straight away, but do you have any advice or suggestions for me to get to know him more??

Thanks a lot!!!!!!All your advice is greatly appreciated!!

Vaniessa.

Answer
HI V.

This is the easiest question for any of us to answer because you've already answered your own question.  Your only mistake in all this is thinking that it's weird to ask him the 'straight way."  Believe me, there's nothing wrong with you coming straight out and striking up a conversation to find out anything you would like to know about him.  Your feelings about it being weird to initiate a conversation may simply be your own fear about whether or not he'll reject your approach.  Think about this very seriously and don't try to skate around the fact that you're interested and he may not be.  You're never going to know if this is a relationship to pursue if you don't pursue it.  He may have someone in his life or he may not.  But you're never going to know if you don't get to know him better. Likewise, he may be a complete jerk or he may not. But you're never going to find out if you don't try to get to know him better by striking up a simple conversation and letting the rest work itself out.  Don't let the age thing stand in your way or use it as an excuse to not say anything to him.  Since you don't have anything going with this guy right now, you've got nothing to lose--that is, if you're not afraid of your ego being bruised if he's not interested.  But you're not going to know anything by holding back.

God Bless

L.E.