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How to Attract the Man of Your Dreams/answer to my quesstion I'm 55 but don't look it.

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QUESTION: Hi again Dr. Neder..I gave you a great review as you deserved it. Although you don't know that while I grew up in exotic countries, no man paid my way. I did, I worked in medicine and trained horses, and the resort industry. Why do men think that if women grew up that way because parents took her that she is a gold digger. I was terrified of getting pregnant because of my parents, it doesn't mean I'm frigid and controlling. You assume I didn't experiment with my sexuality. I've made up for that very well over the years. Women are not all controlling..My ex husband raped and almost killed two girls under 12. He was in the air force. Keep it real. He's dead now, killed in prison for what he did. I like people and tried dating sites, which I would never do again. You are a true male chauvinist, just because of a few bad women, and a few bad men, don't think because you have Dr. in front of your name you know it all. I appreciated your points though and am going to read your book. Thank you again, Lesley

ANSWER: Hello Lesley!

Thanks for your supportive words and for the feedback. I don't often get either.

Keep in mind that my response was to your points - how men view them. You (and most women) lay out things you consider positive attributes because you want to see them in men. That doesn't mean they fit what men want in women - at all. In fact, these are masculine qualities. If a man is looking for masculine qualities in their partner, they'll likely date other men.

At the same time most women today denigrate feminine qualities - just as you have. Men and women really do speak different languages. Assuming that men feel, think, speak or act like you do or want what you want in the way you want it is an obvious source of why you're where you are (the reason you wrote to me originally).

You decided to take what I said personally. No surprise there, but consider that in fact that "Dr." was earned. Add to it 16 books of research, over 45,000 of these sorts of questions answered, thousands of appearances on TV/radio and in-person, etc., etc., make me an expert, and yes, Lesley, I *do* "know it all" - at least in this subject.

Let's also be clear here: I know what you want. I know that without even knowing you or your background. That's because I know "the human condition". You have your own experiences, beliefs and "way" but foundationally, we all want the same things. We just go about getting them differently. As I said, I also know that what you want (or, to be specific, what you THINK you want) is incongruent with the way you're going about trying to get it.

Therein, lays the rub.

I'll bet if we stripped away all that facade, you're a really great woman; a great person - someone who would be a wonderful partner for an equally-great guy. The challenge is expressing that to your target market in the way they want and need it. Ultimately, that's a waste in that at least two people (maybe more!) are missing out.

I; in my own arrogance, want better than that for you.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
323.638.4145
http://beingaman.com
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Sorry to bother you for the last time Dr. Neder, Lesley Stewar here again, jut wondering if you can tell me which of your books etc would be one of the best ones for me to read, I have a lot more to learn I know, but where to start, and once again, Thank You. Lesley

Answer
Hello again Lesley!

Don't worry. You're not a bother.

I've found that women seem to get the most out of my latest book, "Being a Man in a Woman's World III". It talks very deeply about many of the tenants of modern dating and relationships from a woman's perspective, how men perceive them and how men can deal with them. Thus, it becomes a look (for women) both from inside and out.

The bottom line: you're only 6 inches from solving your own problems! (The distance between your ears.) As I said before, you seem like a great woman and deserve to have someone wonderful in your life if only you can learn to express your value in a way your target market understands, wants and needs.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
323.638.4145
http://beingaman.com
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”

How to Attract the Man of Your Dreams

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Dr. Dennis W. Neder

Expertise

Literally, any question related to finding and meeting the man of your dreams. I am the top-rated expert in "General Dating Questions", "How to Attract the Man/Woman of your Dreams" and "Places to Meet People". In fact, over the past few years, I've answered over 32,000 letters from readers, have written over 700 articles, written numerous books, recorded CD's and DVD's, done hundreds of radio and tv shows and have millions of readers all over the world. If your question is particularly sensitive you can also write to me privately and securely at: dwneder@beingaman.com.

Experience

I've written many books on every aspect of dating, sex and relationships. My new book, "How Women Can Approach Men" is already quickly becoming one of our best-sellers! Women have many tools at their disposal and shouldn't have to wait for "Mr. Right" to come along! After reading some of the advice the women in this section are getting from other women, I think it's a good idea to offer a man's perspective.

Organizations
Numerous boards and commissions, civic organizations, etc.

Publications
Thousands of websites, magazines, radio and TV.

Education/Credentials
Doctor of Philosophy

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