Expert: Susan Dunn, Dating Coach - 11/16/2007

Question
Hi,
I am 19 years old and my problem is that I seem to attract much older men (mid 30's - 40's) but guys my age (18-29) don't give me the time of day.  I have never had a real boyfriend and I would like to find someone special. While at the same time I would appreciate not being hit on by older men, since it makes me really uncomfortable.
As far as I look... umhh I don't consider myself pretty at all but I do try to be presentable most of the time. Also I do my best to avoid wearing anything that may seem too slutty, while not covering myself up too much.
I have been told in the past that I can look like I am 23 and that I act at times older too, but in the past, my few guy friends have treated me like a little sister only and it has been 4 years since anyone has asked me out. This is confusing... please help
-Noret

Answer
Dear Noret,

I do not know why you attract older men.  It may be that for some reason they are more appealing to YOU, and so you act differently around them.  Check this out.  For one thing, from your email, you EXPECT the attention from older men, and that sets a "self-fulfilling prophecy."

You are still very early in the dating game.  Dating at 15 is not the same as dating at 19, and there is still plenty of time ahead.

I can't tell exactly where the problem lies - if you want personal coaching, it would be helpful and we could go over it at length.

In the meantime, play the ole dating game like everyone else does.  Not every guy will like you - nor will you like every guy, but sooner or later, it will work out.

All the best,
Susan Dunn
www.susandunn.cc
sdunn@susandunn.cc

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