Expert: Rhapsody Love - 10/2/2006

Question
I started woking at this company for a few months now. and i got out of a bad relationship with my ex at the same time. When i met my manager i felt alive agan... and ready to move on with him. its been a while now we hang out go for drinks with other co-workers but nothing happens. i feel he is attractive to me but he wont cross the line. I feel extremely shy around him, and cant even talk normal because i get nervous.  but i dream about us every night. what should i do>> help me please

Answer
Katherine,

He can't date you. Dating workers is against harrassment policy and can cause serious problems in the work place. I don't know how those policies read and what is recommended. If you asked an HR person, they would probably tell you that you'd need to resign before you could approach him. I don't think it would be a problem to talk to him if you found a way to see him after work. You need to know if he's married or dating anyone first. You also need to determine if he's straight (not gay). If he is actually single and possibly looking, then you might want to try to find out if you were in different circumstances, if  he'd consider dating you. You could tell him that you know that due to harrassment laws and policies he probably couldn't date you, but that you'd like to know if there were different circumstances, if he might be interested. Of course, if he says "no", that could be awkward, too. It might be better if you just try to get over him as a romantic interest, concentrate on work at work, and get involved in things after work that exposes you to men around your age.

Good luck!

- Joyce