Expert: Azure - 10/27/2003

Question
Hi, I was wondering whether you could help me out please - there's this guy I really like (he's 29, I'm 23). We've been on a couple of dates, & as far as I was concerned everything was going really well. He came across as a genuine guy, and he agreed that we get on great together.

He works in the same office as me, although our work doesn't bring us together much. He has a reputation for being a 'lady's man' but when I joked about this with him he said it was all just rumours. He said he really liked me & I was very happy to see how things went.

Just incase he intended using me for a 'one night stand' I gently explained that I was looking for more than just sex, I said I would put my cards on the table & he could take them or leave them - he said he'd take them. He took my number, and sent me text messages.
Then for no apparrent reason he didn't return the first text I sent him (without him texting me first), and has practically ignored me every day in work since.
I was confused, so approached him nicely & asked whether something was wrong, he replied saying he didn't want a relationship as he wasn't ready.
Now he won't even look at me in work, I feel angry and confused although I never let it show. I can't help thinking that his mates have been telling him I'm not 'all that' & he's bowed to peer pressure.
I'm looking for a way to get him to notice me again, to see what he's missing, to get back the guy I met in the beginning.
Please help, I'd be so grateful
Many Thanks

Answer
c'mon ang; how about holding on to some measure of self-esteem and forgetting about it?...when you put your cards on the table he SAID he'd take them, but his actions said "i'll pass.."..judge the man by his behavior, not his words...stop chasing; if he was interested in a relationship you'd know it; for whatever reason, he's not......move on..az