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Question Hi me and my bf Cameron have been dating for awhile now last month we were engaged he got cold feet and called off the engagement saying we were spending too much time together weve never quarreled and we get along great but i think he obviously got scared is ther any tips on how to not scare him off and possible get that commitment one day thanks aline
Answer sure; first, you didn't "scare him off.."..for whatever reason, he's simply not ready to make such an important commitment; second, you don't try to "get" a commitment; it's something that just happens naturally when two people want to spend their lives together; rather than go into a premature engagement, it's possible he did you a favor here, rather than winding up in divorce court four years from now..don't know your age, but if you're under 25, you shouldn't even be THINKING of marriage; finally, if he thinks you're spending too much time together, give him the freedom he wants, even by not seeing him when you ordinarily would; he needs to know there's TWO people here who have a say in what happens, not just him; he can't just arbitrarily press the ON or OFF button; it's quite possible he's much too SURE of you; shake him out of his complacency by either not being so available, or informing what YOUR requirements are for continuing exclusive dating, or both; resolve not to settle for less than you deserve, and tell him exactly what that means; thusly, the key is to become more assertive as to what YOU WANT/NEED/EXPECT, and worry less about chasing HIM..
