Expert: Susan Dunn, Dating Coach - 11/3/2007

Question
Hi I'm 19 years old and this guy I've been seriously falling for is a few years older than me, 7 to be exact. I have had a crush in him since we worked together about a year ago. A few months after i left my job, I called him at work to ask if he wanted to hang out, but he said he had a girlfriend. I accepted it, a few months later he calls me very late at like 2:40 am. His excuse is that he got a text message from my phone, impossible, I didn't have his cell number at that time. We had an amazing conversation, and all my feelings came back. We had hung out a few times, I asked what he wanted from 'this', he established to me he didnt want a girlfriend, but we would see where it went. Supposedly he has been in 3 back to back failed relationships. Maybe he is lying maybe not, I have trust issues because of my last relationship. Anyway...the time we spend together is great. But I cant help to feel that this might be a sexual thing for him. I dont wanna scare him away, but at the same time i cant stay away from him. I know he said he wasnt looking for anything like that right now. Is it possible to get more from him? I mean how can I get him to see how amazing we could be together? Please help!!! I'm in too deep to just forget about him...I'm going crazy

Answer
Dear D,
Well it doesn't sound too promising.  When a guy says he's not interested in a girl friend, generally they mean it.  And you need to hear him.  Of course if he changes his tune, you will know it.  Probably important to avoid anything physical until you know where he's coming from.  I hope your affections are reciprocated, but hold on to your heart until you find out.  Go slow and keep your wits about you.

Good luck!
Susan Dunn
www.susandunn.cc

Personal coaching to help you with your dating.  Internet courses and ebooks.  email sdunn@susandunn.cc