Expert: Azure - 5/26/2006

Question
hi , iam not sure if my question is within your area , but i will just ask and see.iam 25 years old and i have been secretly in love with a guy for as long as i can remember , but he lives in another country . our parents are friends and we have know each other for so long .i never had the chance to tell him how i feel , and then last years i had a chance to be in his country for a couple of months and stayed with him and his parents for a while . but trouble is he had a girlfriend at the time and knew i had a boyfriend too . it killed me everytime i saw them together . now iam back and iam engaged to my boyfriend ( one of the reasons i said yes was because i thought it will never work and i need to get over him, but this is not working ) and he is still with his girlfriend .now i want to tell him, but i don t want to lose him . what can i do . i thought of maybe sending him and e mail unsigned and see what happens , but i figured how would you know what happend when he is a million miles away . i don t know what to do , it is making me miserable.

Answer
you're allowing a fantasy to ruin your life; you're engaged and he has a girlfriend, and you think by telling him how you feel this fairy tale is somehow all gonna work out?..you can't "lose" him since you never "had" him, but should tell him ASAP, so either you miraculously live happily everafter or you put this dream finally out of your head and get on with your life..