Expert: Rhapsody Love - 12/6/2007

Question
Hello I would like to know how do I find a man of my dreams that i can fall in love with  that is not taken cause this male friend of mine  he wanted me in the past and we just reconnected few weeks ago but currently he has a woman but he tells me she is very jealous about any women friends of his please help

Answer
Lorraine,

If you go out with a man whom you know is taken, they that makes him a cheater. Would you want to date a cheater? If he can cheat on her, why wouldn't he cheat on you? Forget him as a lover, he's taken. However, if he wants you to be a friend to just have an occasional conversation or something, if he girlfriend has a problem with that, it's between him and her.

Maybe you need to take a break from men and look at yourself and how you do relationships and what characteristics you're looking for in Mr. Right.

Three resources for that would be:

http://www.keirsey.com/

http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/

where you can take tests to find out about yourself and get information on personality types to learn who would make a good match for you.  Another possility is here:

http://love.ivillage.com/lnsquizzes/lnsquizlns/topics/0,,4tg3,00.html

I also like Linda Goodman's "Love Signs":

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&lr=&ie=ISO-8859-1&as_qdr=all&q=%22Linda+Goodm...

though I am skeptical about astrology, I find this is surprisingly

realistic & she discusses positive and negative qualities in a relationship & how to deal with a relationship with different types of personalities (it certainly couldn't hurt to check it out). BTW, this is a Google search link because the links I've chosen in the past have disappeared - sorry it's so long. Here's a shorter one:

http://tinyurl.com/r2o0

Once you know yourself better and know what kind of mate would be good for you and have thought about other qualities that you would want, you can better figure out where to find such a person.  Where might this person be, work, go for recreation?  Would this person attend a church or other religious organization and if so, what kind (conservative, liberal - or you might try Unitarian Universalist where people of many faiths worship together)? Also, if you're in a city or metropolitan area, there might be Meet-ups near you - find an area that interests you and sign up for a Meet-up which takes place with at least 4 other people in a public place - you can also suggest a venue closer to your location.:

http://www.meetup.com/

Would that person be looking for you on the internet?  If so, check out

http://dmoz.org/Society/Relationships/Dating/Personals/

- there are loads of places to go on the internet where you can get a profile and even search by location as well as interest.  You can get to know the person anonymously first; read

http://www.ou.edu/oupd/kidsafe/websafe.htm

and

http://www.sanfords.net/Mom_Dear/Dating_on_the_Internet.shtml

before trying this out.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

- Joyce