Expert: Rhapsody Love - 3/7/2007

Question
hi! My name is Nathalie and I'm 14 year old. I have this crush on a guy who is older than me-probably 15 or 16. He doesn't know me and I really want to introduce myself to him. I'm a sort of a shy person and I don't know how to be friends with him. Can you give me some other ways on how to have an excuse to talk with him when he is actually alone? cauz everytime I try to talk with him, he is surrounded by friends. He has a brother who is in my class but I don't talk to him anyway. what can I do so that I can be friends with him?

Answer
It is hard to start a conversation with someone who is always surrounded by friends. I met my husband in  high school and he was pretty popular - at least in that he had a lot of friends. I caught him while we were walking down the street on a field trip the first time we talked and then later in the hall when he was at his locker. Hopefully you'll find a time to talk to this guy, too. Here's what you can do when you get the chance:

You can start by talking about something you already know about him (music he listens to, something you've overheard him talking about) or you can talk about the place where you first saw him asking how long he's been coming there, how did he find it or why did he start coming.  If those ideas don't work for this situation, you could start by talking about something in the news that you heard that morning and ask his opinion about it.   You can eventually move the conversation to likes and dislikes (movies, food, music, sports, hobbies, etc.) and if he mentions he likes to do something that you also like, you could ask him if he'd like to go to that with you.  If you keep up on the latest movies, sports events, concerts, etc., then you could suggest a specific one and possibly say you were planning to go any way, so it doesn't look like you're asking him on a "date."

Good luck!

- Joyce