Expert: Alex Strandberg - 11/8/2008

Question
Hi I have a problem I am in school and love a girl whom is  very pretty, very smart, class president and recently won first place in a cross country race and is going to states. You see I really have to get going before she gets to a age in which she will be attracted to older boys. I know I like her but she really is worth it I tell you .

Anyway I will mention a few things, one she brought me cookies on my birthday this year specially for me maybe she wants attention? Hmmn and two a classmate tells me last year she told him that she liked me not jokingly! But is he honest? Is he trying to embarrass me? Please if critisism is needed don't hesitate I need anything I can get she also was overheard saying she thinks I act strange around her and that I have been dressing nice lately. Is her radar on because she likes me, I can't tell but I hope so. Thanks  

Answer
Hey,

She may or may not like you but her being attracted to you isn't the issue. The real issue is you putting her on this untouchable, goddess that walks among men pedestal. She may have this, that and the other thing going for her but she doesn't have more value than you do.

Your thinking that she is better than you is written all over your question. You are hoping that she would come down from her cloud and slum it a little bit with you.

If she does in fact like you, this type of thinking will definitely kill that attraction very quickly. No girl wants to be with a guy that worships her and that would thank God if they got a shot with her. The first couple of days it would be flattering but after that it would annoy her to no end.

You need to realize that she is not special. She is no better or no worse than anyone else. She wouldn't be doing you a favor by being interested in you. It would be beneficial to the both of you.

With that said, she seems like she is interested in you. Ask her out. If she rejects you it will only help you out more. Confidence is created by pushing through fears. It might sting for a little while but your confidence will rise.

Cheers,
Alex