Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 10/14/2009

Question
So I'm 17, almost 18 and a senior in high school.  There is this pretty hot junior girl, apparently she's a German exchange student.  But anyways i don't have any classes with her, I've never talked to her, and the only times i see her are in the hall way, lunch, and sometimes i see her hanging out by the senior lockers with some of her girl friends.  What would be a good way to successfully approach this girl and build a good rapport so that i can ask her out in the near future?

Answer
Hello Mark!

There are literally hundreds of approaches, but the easiest, and frankly, the best is the "context approach".

In order to use this approach, you simply have to come up with the context in which you want to approach her. If you think about it, you already have a bunch of things in common with her. For example, you go to the same school. That's enough to use the context approach alone!

You also know that she's German. Haven't you always wanted to go to Germany? Of course you have! There's a great context approach right there! You can actually just walk up to her and say, "Hey there - you're from Germany, right?" That leads to all sorts of questions you can talk to her about - and build huge rapport and connection at the same time. You can ask her how she's enjoying the US, what she misses most about home, who she's met, etc., etc.

To learn more about how to build a conversation, go to my website (http://BeingAMan.com) and click on "self help". From there, read my FAQ's.

Finally, you can close her right there and then for a actual date by saying, "Well, I have to run to class, but I'd like to continue this conversation. Let's get together for coffee (or whatever) sometime next week. Here, write down your phone number and I'll call you..."

Smooth!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
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