Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 3/10/2009

Question
hello dr.neder


i wrote to you about a week ago about my selfish girlfriend which i have since left and cut my ties with. Right well upon going out at the weekend i bump into an old friend who has a girlfriend with her she happens to be good friends with my ex gfs best friend ( still with me ).. Right well upon meeting this girl i really hit it off with her shes flirting a little not over the top but a little i end up spending the entire evening with her untill she drops me home in a taxi at about 2 in the morning i give her a kiss on the cheek and say bye now all night that weve been spending together the friend who was out with us was trying to set us up now im not in love with this girl but i do like her i left my number with the friend not the gal i et and leave it there she asks me to add her on facebook which i do and i write her a little message but since this night no contact no text message or anything am i just being a little impatient it seems like ive forgot what to do to keep her interested many thanks aaron

Answer
Hello Aaron!

Do you have a phobia about using periods (.) or something? It sure makes it difficult to know when one though ends and another begins with one loooonnnnngggggg sentence!

Why didn't you close this girl for her digits when you had the chance? Now, you have to play the Facebook game with her, going back and forth and you STILL have to get her number anyway! That's terrible form - and you'd better trust me on this one - she IS going to play you here! You set yourself up for this and now she's going to take full advantage of it.

Here's a simple rule: don't EVER accept only an email address or Facebook or MySpace connection! It's far, far easier to play you and try to keep you on the hook as long as she can without going anywhere. This is exactly what is going to happen now.

You didn't bother asking me a question here - you just told me a story, so I'm going to have to assume you want an answer as to what to do now. The answer is to get her damn digits already! If she won't give them to you, you're going to have to kick yourself for being so dumb and move on.

Tell her to give them to you and CALL HER; DO NOT try to flirt or date this girl on Facebook! You're just going to cause her to lose interest very quickly and you'll lose her. Get to another date right away and turn on the charm. This HAS TO (and I mean HAS TO) be done in person!!!!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
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