Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 6/6/2009

Question
QUESTION: Hi there, my name is Tom. I like this girl in my school. We are good friends and we converse with each other via sms. But however, mostly i initiate such conversations. And moreover, i do not flirt with her or create an impression most of the time. I want to take it a step further and get her to like me, and make our relationship more mutual. How do I go about doing that? Do i have to play around with her thinking? And by the way, she broke up with someone a few months ago. Thanks in advance for your advice.

ANSWER: Hello Tom!

Forget trying to screw with her head. That's just going to get you into trouble with her.

Instead, get the hell OFF of the SMS! That's killing you right there! You've got to get this into real life and off of technology. Stop trying to use technology as a buffer to keep you away from her. You need to be close to her instead - physically.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
BAM! TV
818.334.8826
http://beingaman.com
http://beingaman.tv
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
Producers of "BAM! TV"

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Tks for yr advice. However, the thing is that it is currently holidays and we do not get to meet each other. That is why we communicate via sms. So can u give me some examples where i can communicate with her better? And also, if i have to be with her physically, i defenitely have to ask her out. How do i go about doing that without making it seem very random and awkward? And what should i ask her out for, like to study together? Can u guide me?
Tks alot...

Answer
Hello again Tom!

Yes, you definitely have to ask her out!

It doesn't have to seem awkward at all. Just say, "Hey - we should get together sometime this next week. What evening is better for you, Thursday or Friday?" That doesn't seem awkward, does it?

Yes, you can ask her out to study if you want, or to just grab a drink or take a walk or whatever. What you do isn't as important as actually being together and getting "face time". The only caution is that you actually make it face time. Don't go to a movie or a concert for instance. You need to spend time face-to-face.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
BAM! TV
818.334.8826
http://beingaman.com
http://beingaman.tv
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
Producers of "BAM! TV"