Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 3/16/2010

Question
I went to a Persian festival party last night and during the time there, i noticed many girls looking at me. They were either staring at me from a distance, or gave repetitive glances whenever i was close by or walked pass them! I noticed everyone girl was staring when i started speaking to a girl alone.Also guys were looking at me strangely too. Btw i'm tall,have a nice body,dress nicely & have been told i'm good looking. Could this be the reason? Normally i'm shy and self concious. How do you know when a girl is interested via eye contact ?

Answer
Hello Dany!

From your description it's very hard to say. These girls (and guys!) could be interested in you  or you could remind them of a serial killer. There's no way to know from this description.

In general, women who are interested in you will make eye contact with you, hold it for a bit too long and then, look down and away. Then, they'll do it again within a short time - usually seconds.

If you get one eye-contact from someone, it doesn't mean much. People look around to see who and what else is around them just to make sure that there's not a bear around ready to maul them to death.

On the other hand, multiple eye "connections" (again, held a little too long and then broken by looking down and then to the side) made within seconds of each other are very good signs that you need to go talk to that girl.

One more point of confusion: the community you live in has a lot to do with this. For instance, here in Southern California where I live, eye contact is VERY short. Thus, it's only held for fractions of a second. A one- or two-second eye connection is a huge thing.

In the mid-west however, that would be considered a "normal" amount of time. Thus, you have to judge this based on local standards, not absolute amounts of time.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
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