Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 1/10/2011

Question
I am student and attracted to a fellow sudent.Sadly she is already in a realtonship with a guy in her home country.Although she is in a distance reationship,which she mentioned to be serious,I personally beleive I hold a good chance of attracting her.We chat alot and most of the time she starts a conversation.And she laughs a lot around me.I would like to know clearly as to how I can approach her and let her know I am interested in her,without damaging our current realtionship?

Answer
Hello Mario!

What the hell???? Mario, come on here. Do you seriously think you can get close to her WITHOUT damaging her current relationship? Are you seriously thinking that's possible, because if you do, you're delusional. It can't happen. You WILL damage (and possibly destroy) her current relationship if you do this so decide if you're willing to do that first.

With that said; you don't have the right to decide for her who is a better choice of men to date - you or long-distance guy ("LDG"). The reality is this: the LDG doesn't have a relationship with her, it's simply "on hold" until/unless she returns.

Thus, if you're interested in this girl, I suggest you move this forward and let her decide what she wants rather than you trying to make that decision for her.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
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