Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 11/9/2011

Question
Dear Dr. Neder
My relationships with women have not been successful. They usually followed a certain pattern: I met them, showed them my affections, then had some interesting conversations here and there and then they got cold. Forgot me. Didn't respond my messages.

I have gone through this cycle a couple of times and now I feel hurt enough, I don't want to re-experience it. I just don't know how to be successful with women and desperately need some help here. They are a complete mystery to me and I am afraid I might get pessimistic about them.

Can you show me out of this sad darkness?

What can I do to best help myself??

Ferdinand from Montreal

Answer
Hello Ferdinand!

You have no idea how often I hear this exact same story. It's sad, not just from the effects it has on you (embarrassment, humiliation, becoming jaded about dating and women in general, demoralizing, etc.) but because it's so absolutely preventable/fixable.

Here's the real problem: people are incredibly arrogant! They don't know what to do, but figure if they just keep doing what they've been doing all along, eventually it'll work. They think that investing in any real skills is a waste of time because all they need is one trick to just get them the love of their lives and then, they won't need it any more. The reality however is that the belief just isn't true. These are the skills you use for the REST of your life, not just to find and win love, but to KEEP IT.

Today, women are incredibly unforgiving about even the smallest mistake. For many reasons, women have become unreasonably picky when it comes to the men they are willing to date. They are being told by everyone with a breath that they can "have it all". In fact, that they deserve it.

Unfortunately, they don't deserve it and they can't have it all. I see just as few women working on their dating and relationship skills as men. They read a few articles and ask a few questions, but fall back to tricks and techniques their mothers and grandmothers used - when times where very, very different than they are today.

However, it's men that have to do the initial approaching and thus, take the brunt of the rejection. I see otherwise great guys getting brushed off by girls that don't even deserve them! I see girls trying to create huge value that they could never even deliver!

With all that sad news, there is some light however. There are answers. The fact is, you need to change your entire belief system and with it, your "game". You need to learn what works and (far more important) WHY it works. Then, your experience will change completely - not before.

So, yes, I can show you the path out of this misery, but YOU have to walk the steps. I can't do that part for you.

You have a number of options. One is to start with my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II". These books will teach you the exact mindset and skills you need in order to start being that guy that women are actually looking for *AND* how to express them. (You need BOTH skills!)

If you prefer, I also offer personal coaching help on this very topic. I've worked with thousands of guys (and girls) from all over the world on dealing not just with general issues, but also very specific problems and even very specific women/men. These people were in exactly the same boat you're in right now and changed their own lives. There are answers!

Both of these paths will get you where you want to go, but as I said before, YOU have to take the steps. Go to my website (http://BeingAMan.com) choose a path and let's get started. After all, if you don't do something TODAY to change things, TOMORROW is going to be exactly the same. If you don't do something THIS WEEK, NEXT WEEK will be exactly like this one. So will next month and next year.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President/CEO/Executive Producer
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
BAM! Productions
818.334.8826
http://beingaman.com
http://beingaman.tv
Publisher of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
Producer of "BAM! TV"