Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 12/27/2011

Question
Hello Dr. I understand that a response takes big effort, and I most respect your time into this matter.

I am a single man, educated, done well in business and a pure gentleman. I handle all aspects of my life with confidence except talking to women that I like. I cant do it!

The most beautiful woman in the world (to me) has been my friend for many years. Although I have watched her date one wrong guy after the other, my mind dictates that I am no where near in her league.

to me, shes is on a pedestal, beyond my reach, and I am held back from stepping up and telling her how I feel as a result of some unconquerable barrier within myself.

I need help, every time I have a chance to be brave and feel it out, I freeze! And as always, in the end, i look and feel like a major dork...

This is the girl of my dreams, in the past Id just forget it, but she is certainly different. Enough for me to reach out and Humbly ask you advise

How do I approach this long time friend, and at least get out how i really feel, without scaring her away?

Thank you for your time again,

Jacob
32 yrs old, either of us ever married. no kids

Answer
Hello Jacob!

First of all, stop telling yourself you can't talk to women. You CAN do it. You simply lack a little education. That's it.

The biggest problem you have with this woman is that you were a coward and instead of getting what you really wanted and deserved, you tried to "work it from the inside" by making her your friend.

I see guys doing this almost every day. They hope that by getting cozy with a girl that she'll see what a great guy he is and then will do all his work for him and take all the risks.

Jacob, this simply never, ever works!

Women have a built-in mechanism for preventing this from happening. There are millions of years of evolution behind all of this by the way. You're trying to work against all of that. Mother nature isn't forgiving here at all.

Now, you're worried about "scaring her away". Are you kidding? What you're really asking me for is some magic pill or something. Well, actually there *IS* a magic pill, but it takes a ton of work - and isn't something I can advise you on via these messages. There are many, many "plays" you need to make in order to have any chance of turning this around into something more than you have right now.

First of all, you're going to have to make a decision. That decision will dictate your next moves.

Either you don't want to lose her as a friend and have absolutely no chance with her for something more, or you're willing to burn the bridge and hopefully have something with her.

If you're not willing to lose her as a friend, then do nothing. Stop right here. Instead, get my books, "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II" and start learning how to talk to women, build rapport and connection and start having the dating/sex/relationships that you actually deserve to have.

On the other hand, if you're really ready to have a chance at getting this fixed, you're going to need some coaching. I suggest you get a couple of hours from my website to get started on all of this.

I know you're looking for the fast, easy magic trick but there simply isn't any. You've done far too much damage here for any "trick" to ever work.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President/CEO/Executive Producer
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Remington Publications
BAM! Productions
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Publisher of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
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