How to Attract the Woman of Your Dreams/What to do?


Hello Dr Dennis
I met this girl more than 4 months ago, we are both 20. We hit it off well and I am guaranteed that she liked me as well. We spent hours and hours talking and flirting etc, it definitely was there. However it was 2 months ago when she left with family for a 3 month trip (back in a month) to Europe to visit her cousin. When i found out, I 100% knew her interest would decline and this is why i am now here lol.

It was still going great month into her trip as we mantained the type of contact which seems like she did't leave for her trip. However it now slowly came to the point that it is clear she isnt longer  interested, doesnt start convo, doesnt really ask how was your day and what been happening? and even said I was annoying..
When she said i was annoying i respected that and didnt really winge about it or anything but just admited defeat. i gave her space for next month and we talk abit every now and then..
this was a clear message  that she no longer inerested as this has now been going on for a month now. (i just feel there still a chance because she had been in france with family and relatives, while im still here in sydney, so maybe this is just tempoarily?)

Any ways, what should i do? she still gone for another month. I know not to be clingy and give her own space.. but just doesnt seem to work.. how do i get her re interesed? or chasing me like before? (i got to admit out of all other girls i have dated this one had got to be the one most into me) or should i just wait until she is back to see if it sparks again?


Hello Kevin!

This is actually a long-distance relationships ("LDR") and if you've read anything I've written about the subject (which is a lot) they don't work out.

Unfortunately, you tried to dominate her time when she was gone. Yes, I know you're going to tell me that it was her that initiated everything - I don't believe it for a moment. You didn't want her to forget about you while she was gone and now look at where you are.

You have likely done more damage here than can be repaired. If she's telling you that you're annoying her, she's not going to be coming back looking for more of that. You need to get the hell out of the way and stop looking like you're waiting for her.

Stop contacting her and get on with your life. I'd suggest you start dating some new girls in the process. If she comes back and contacts you, you might have another chance *IF* you don't try to over-engage her. Let her set the pace and keep looking beyond her. She'll catch up if she gets over being annoyed.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”

How to Attract the Woman of Your Dreams

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Dr. Dennis W. Neder


I am the author of the books "Being a Man in a Woman`s World I & II" and "1001 Places and Techniques to Meet Great Women" and 11 others. I`ve spent the last 20 years studying the art and science of every aspect of relationships, dating and sex, and have answered over 30,000 letters from readers from all over the world. I'm able to answer literally any question regarding dating, finding and approaching women, sex, getting phone numbers, setting dates, what to do on dates, how to set them (and make sure she shows), dealing with dating problems, conversion from dates to relationships, etc. Check my website at: for much more. If your question is particularly sensitive you can email me privately and securely at:


Having helped over 30,000 people with their issues, I'm certainly qualified to help you with yours. I don't take the "feel good" approach at all. I'm direct and that comes from experience and research into what really works.

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