How to Attract the Woman of Your Dreams/What is my next step?


Hi Mr Dennis,

Here are the facts of my situation. Got a girl's number because she was in my group for a group project and we had to communicate via mobile for the project ( so its not like i asked her for her number, but we all exchanged numbers as it was necessary for the groupwork.) I managed to have some lone talking time with her during only one of the meetings, but it was too short to really establish a rapport. One week after i got her number, it was the last lesson for the year and the group project was over. So i wanted to ask her to have dinner in college itself, to just be straightforward. But there were two other guys, her frie.ds who were in my group as well who kept hanging around between the 2 of us and interrupting things.  Soon after, my friends came over as well and i didnt feel like asking her out in front of so many people. Later that night i texted her, telling her i wanted to ask her out for.dinner but the other guys were disturbing us. So i texted asking when she would be free the next day.  She then replied saying she is busy the whole week and wont be free. So i just replied saying its cool and i never communicated with her at all after that. The thing now is, i wont have any chance to see her personally anymore since college is over. The only way i can communicate with her is through the handphone. What should i do next? Exams is coming up in one week as well, so should i wait till after the exam, if anything?

Also, a bizarre thing happened. Later in the week after i asked her out, i received a call from her phone. Only to pick up to hear one of her male friend( one of the disturbing guy as i mentioned earlier) on the phone. The thing is, i was texting that guy on his phone regarding an assignment, so there was no need for him to use her phone. And another thing is, if the girl is not interested, why would she want to let someone else use her phone to call me?  So please answer my main question as mentioned in the previous paragraph and this question as well. Thanks !!!


Hello Jack!

Just to be complete, it really doesn't take much time to develop rapport with someone. In fact, if you really know what you're doing it only takes about 2-3 minutes!

Yes, you should wait until after exams. Right now, she's very likely focused on studying - not partying. However, afterwards she'll be in a very different frame of mind and will likely want to relax and blow off some steam. That's the time to contact her and invite her to have coffee or a drink with you.

Don't worry about the guy using her phone. His phone could have had it's battery die or he could be trying to make you think he's with the girl in order to get you to back off. If he thinks you're a threat that's a good thing! It means that she's holding him off.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
CEO/Executive Producer
BAM! Productions
Remington Publications
Producers: "BAM! TV" and “Love and Sex”
Publishers: "Being a Man in a Woman's World I, II & III”

How to Attract the Woman of Your Dreams

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Dr. Dennis W. Neder


I am the author of the books "Being a Man in a Woman`s World I & II" and "1001 Places and Techniques to Meet Great Women" and 11 others. I`ve spent the last 20 years studying the art and science of every aspect of relationships, dating and sex, and have answered over 30,000 letters from readers from all over the world. I'm able to answer literally any question regarding dating, finding and approaching women, sex, getting phone numbers, setting dates, what to do on dates, how to set them (and make sure she shows), dealing with dating problems, conversion from dates to relationships, etc. Check my website at: for much more. If your question is particularly sensitive you can email me privately and securely at:


Having helped over 30,000 people with their issues, I'm certainly qualified to help you with yours. I don't take the "feel good" approach at all. I'm direct and that comes from experience and research into what really works.

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