Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 11/1/2006

Question
Hello again Dr. Neder,
I recently asked you a question about a woman that is interested in me and that i im interested in. It turns out that the other day my friend told me that she has a boyfriend and that is why she isnt forthcoming about getting together with me as much as i would like. I think about this girl all of the time still. Should i talk to her online and ask her to go out with me alone even though she has a boyfriend. My friend tells me that she wants to break up with him because it isnt working out and that they are no longer compatible. He tells me that she could see herself with me in the future because i am the kind of guy that she would like to be with. I think it is hard for her to break it up with her boyfriend because they have been together for about a year. What should i do? I do really want to see this girl soon though.

thank you very much
John

Answer
Hello John!

No, you shouldn't talk to her on-line to ask her to go out with you. You should do that in person, but if you don't see her, then use the Internet to get her phone number instead and tell her to go out with you via phone.

The boyfriend is a non-issue. As I constantly tell my students, "it's harder to keep a girlfriend than to steal someone else's." That is a fact.

If she brings up the boyfriend, just blow it off and say, "I don't care about him. Let him get his own girl. You seem far too smart to be stuck in that sort of relationship and this is your chance to make something happen. I'll pick you up [or meet you, or whatever] at [time] on [date]. I'm always on time, so be ready."

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
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Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"