Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 3/9/2007

Question
Hi Dr Neder,
Thank you very much for the quick response.
Would it be possible not to rush the kiss so soon?
I don't want to come on too strong, I'm pretty sure I can do what you've told me to but kissing so soon?


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The text above is a follow-up to ...

-----Question-----
Hello again Dr. Dennis W. Neder,
it's me Beowolf again.
I've followed most of your advice, I've had atleast 3 girls to go for at the same time as to not let me get discouraged.
Well some didn't respond and didn't want to get to know me, but the rest just wanted to be my friend.
Now there's this one girl I really want to get with.
We know each other by name, her name's Maria.
She's in my Mentor Class, which we have every Fridays and for only 10 minutes.
I don't wanna ruin this one, this time.
I want to know what to say so she won't just see me as a friend, I want to let her know I should be hers.
We share the same birthday, it so cool.
She's gorgeous and really smart, I've tried to keep my head up everytime a girl says she only wants to be friends or rejects me completely.
Please help me like you did last time.

-----Answer-----
Hello again Beowolf!

The best way to stay out of the "friend zone" is to never get there from the very beginning. That means that you need to treat her like a potential girlfriend - not a friend.

Talk to her and find out about her, but don't let there be any ambiguity about your intentions. Get her phone number and call her to go on a real date. On the date, kiss her, but interested and interesting and especially, be adamant that you're not interseted in her as a "friend".

This is a great example where the direct approach is your best one!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"  

Answer
Hey Beowolf!

The reason why you don't want to kiss her is that you're afraid of how she'll react. Let me ask you: how do you think someone you respect and admire would handle this? Do you think that they'd just let things go until later?

Don't count on it!

Here's why: what really separates a friendship from dating? Only one thing: intimacy. Kissing is intimate. That's why you absolutely MUST kiss her right away. If you don't women begin wondering what you're doing and why all of this is happening if you don't want to move it forward.

Moving it forward is your job!

Don't do all the good work of getting things moving and blow it by not kissing her!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"