Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 11/9/2006

Question
Well according to what she has told me, she is about to get divorced and lose her daughter because according to her she is never home and according to a divorce lawyer that she spoke to her husband is home more and he will get custody which I think is an utter lie but anyway, she is like trying to take her daughter to practice and stuff. But I think if a woman wants the dick, she'll do what it takes to get it. But I could be wrong. I'm sorry to ask u so many questions. But I have never dealt with any woman with children before.
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Well I invited her to lunch and we went with the friend I told you about and now she is selling me out again because of her daughter. So I think I am just going to give up. I told her to let me know when she wanted to go.

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I have a question. From what you tell me this is a sure thing, but like today I was giving her a massage and I told her I give full body massages also and she was like yeah! And then she told me I could give one to her friend that alsoworks with me and I was like I won't give her one. Why is she throwing her friend at me if she likes me? Is this like a test or something?
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Hi, there is this woman at my job. She is the woman of my dreams or should I say fantasies. She is 41 and I am 25. well, in the past month her and I have been talking a lot. She gives me candy, she hugs me, tells me she loves me. I mean even the way she looks at me with this smile like she is on cloud 9. I think you know, the googly eyes with a big open smile. I mean even though she is married, she has cheated on her husband and she is getting divorced anyway. She told me everything about her situation. I am supposed to go out with her this Friday because she had to take her daughter to softball practice yesterday. I mean she tells me what a special guy I am and how she wishes more men were like me. I don't know if she REALLY likes me. I mean I don't want a relationship I just want what all men want. She is too old for me. But she looks very hot. I want to invite her over to my place after dinner, but I don't know how to put it. And I don't know if she is just teasing me. I mean she is older and more experienced. I am used to girls younger than me, those are easy. Please write back.
Thanks
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Hello Erik!

I don't know what you're worried about. This is as sure as the "sure thing" gets! Absolutely you should invite her over to your place (unless she invites you to hers). Just because she is older and more experienced means nothing. It's still your job to put the moves on her. Trust me, she wouldn't go out with you if she didn't have the same thing in mind.

As far as how to put it, wait until dinner is just about over and say (don't ask), "Let's go over to my place for a drink." It's that easy! Have some wine at home just in case.

Also - I teach my students about a little game women (of any age) like to play that you need to be aware of: when things get going, (like you're playing swap-the-spit on the couch), it's likely that she'll say, "Wait, I can't do this" or in some other way she'll pull back. Just expect this - it's a perfectly normal part of the game from women I call "last minute resistence" ("LMR").

The reason for it is that she doesn't want to look like a slut! Thus, you have to handle it just right. Just say, "Yeah, I know." (that is, acknowledge it), but keep right on doing what you're doing! Don't stop and say, "Ok then" or anything like that.

Also be aware that a final "no" is a no, but you'll definitely know the difference between this and LMR.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"

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Hello again Erik!

Don't worry about this at all. It's something of a "mini-challenge". I normally handle this with humor, but you have to be quick to pick it up.

Women use all sorts of these Mini-Tests including this one - it's called "misdirection". Don't worry about it however, it doesn't affect anything to come.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"
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I'm not sure what the daughter has to do with all of this, but if she's hot, why not?

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"

Answer
Yo! Erik!

You might want to read my website about the problems with dating single mothers:

http://www.beingaman.com/articleviewer.asp?ID=67

and check out some others:

http://www.beingaman.com/articlesearch.asp

then type in "single mother" in the "Keywords" box.

Although I'm not entirely sure what any of this has to do with your "date" with her (the mom) and her bringing her daughter with her to lunch, I'd still focus on the goal while being armed with the information from the articles.

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"