Expert: Dr. Dennis W. Neder - 10/5/2006

Question
Hi Dennis,

I need some tips....I met this gal (for the first time) during a gathering at my place...while talking to her she said to me that she could pass some CDs to me....then after some time i asked her when she can pass the CDs to me..she told me that she will pass it to a guy who was also in the gathering...but i dont know whether she is going on with this guy or not...so i took down the guy number..after 1 week i called him but no reply
and also sms him that i need the gal number so that i could pass some CDs to her also..no reply again...again after 4 days my flatmate called the
house (this gal is NOT staying with them, she lives with her parents at another place) and told them that i wanted to pass some CDs to her and asked for her number....her friend said that she have to ask her first before passing the phone number to me....it has been two weeks and i have not heard anything from the gal and her friend....but i heard that the gal i am keen in  will be going overseas for a holiday (or maybe she is on a holiday now).

What I believe is that the guy is not her boyfriend or maybe just a good friend. It is because when the guy said that he has gone to her native country for a visit, she replied that she was never aware that he has gone to her native country in the first place. WHat do you think?

Well if she is not interested, then why must she say that she would like to pass CDs to me? What do you think? Why is she taking so long to pass the number? I don't know IF i meet her some other time, should i ask her number as I feel awkward? You got any suggestions?

Thanks alot for your help.

Regards,
John.


Answer
Hello John!

Wouldn't it be great if women would just come right out and say what they wanted - or didn't? It would save a great deal of time and make everything a lot easier.

Unfortunately, that's not how women work.

I get the impression that this girl was just being nice rather than showing interest. Now, she's using this guy as a "filter" in order to keep you at arm's length. NEXT!

With regards to your question of whether you should ask her for her number the answer is simple: NO. You souldn't ASK for her number. If you want it, TELL her to give it to you!

Best regards...

Dr. Dennis W. Neder
President
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Remington Publications
818.334.8826
www.beingaman.com
Publishers of "Being a Man in a Woman's World I & II"