Expert: PracticalHappiness.com - 3/21/2007

Question
QUESTION: Hi, my name is ---- and i am 24 years old.  I have recently been seeing this lady who is 30 but i do not know if she really likes me the way i like her.  I like her a lot, we have so much fun when we are together.  I know she has some feelings for me.  When we are near its constant eye contact (i mean deep gazing), touching, kissing, and laughter, all the pro's that precede the start of a relationship.  She calls me sweet little names that make me feel good like cutie pie and sexy.  We talk on the phone for hours at a time.  My friends came to visit me for spring break and she wanted me to come and see her for just a bit before i would go out for the evening.  What am i supposed to think about all this?  Please help?

Thank you, ----
ANSWER: Hey, Adam. Thanks for your questino. Based on what you tell me, I can't see how and why you would even doubt that this lady is totally into you? What makes you have second thoughts about it?  

Let me know, and I will follow up.

Thanks,

Arkady Itkin
www.PracticalHappiness.com

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Hey its adam again, I just get the feelig that she might be trying to distance herself from me because i believe that she might be really caught up on the age thing.  But at the same time when we are together, you can't separate us.  I am so confused.  Maybe its my own insecurities, but its like when i find something good i know its good and i do not want to lose it; I always seem to get the shaft in the end.  I try not to sweat her to hard i know she is busy and stuff and is a single parent.  I just want to know but at the same time i am scared to tell her how i feel because i do not want to scare her off.  What should i do?

Answer
I understand, Adam. I am sure your actions speak loud enough, so you don't need to spill your gots about how you feel about her.  

Indeed, fear of loss is a bad emotion to have and it sabotages our relationships because it alters our behavior in many negative ways. You must learn how to enjoy the process of the relationship without being overly attached to the outcome. Lets face it - most relationship are finite. Chances are that this is not your first and not your last one. So admit it and accept it.

Also, there is nothing wrong with assuring her in a cute way that "Just in case, you don't care about her age and in fact you appreciate her being older, more mature, more experienced and probably smarter..."       

It sounds like you are the guy who is curious, who enjoys learning and who would greately benefit from my best-selling program "20 laws of successful relationships." I really believe that it will answer many of your concerns and take your current and any future relationship to a different level.   
You can download this audio program at www.lulu.com/arkady39  

I made sure that it's affordable for everybody, so it's priced for a limited time for just $9.95  

Thanks, and feel free to follow up.

Arkady Itkin
www.Practicalhappiness.com